1
00:00:00,210 --> 00:00:02,370
Welcome to the hair of the dog podcast.

2
00:00:02,460 --> 00:00:03,840
In today's episode,

3
00:00:03,900 --> 00:00:08,370
I am diving into a phobia that I have that well,

4
00:00:09,150 --> 00:00:13,170
not many people know that I have and more importantly,

5
00:00:13,200 --> 00:00:16,110
I'm sharing a step that I took to help to get

6
00:00:16,110 --> 00:00:18,270
over it and move on with my life,

7
00:00:19,170 --> 00:00:20,580
doing all the things that I want to do.

8
00:00:21,090 --> 00:00:23,430
Anyway, you're not going to want to miss this episode.

9
00:00:23,430 --> 00:00:24,710
It's me and Heather.

10
00:00:24,710 --> 00:00:27,190
She is going to help sort this out for me.

11
00:00:27,190 --> 00:00:27,940
Stay tuned.

12
00:00:27,940 --> 00:00:30,350
Welcome to the hair of the dog podcast.

13
00:00:30,350 --> 00:00:32,230
If you're a pet photographer,

14
00:00:32,230 --> 00:00:35,310
ready to make more money and start living a life by

15
00:00:35,310 --> 00:00:36,140
your design,

16
00:00:36,140 --> 00:00:38,320
you've come to the right place.And

17
00:00:38,320 --> 00:00:39,230
now your host,

18
00:00:39,230 --> 00:00:40,430
pet photographer,

19
00:00:40,430 --> 00:00:41,410
travel addict,

20
00:00:41,410 --> 00:00:43,510
chocolate martini connoisseur,

21
00:00:43,510 --> 00:00:44,490
Nicole Begley.

22
00:00:44,540 --> 00:00:45,670
Hey everybody.

23
00:00:45,670 --> 00:00:48,450
Welcome to the hair of the dog podcast.

24
00:00:48,450 --> 00:00:49,500
I'm your host,

25
00:00:49,500 --> 00:00:50,630
Nicole Begley.

26
00:00:50,630 --> 00:00:54,110
And today I have one of our favorite guests back,

27
00:00:54,110 --> 00:00:56,980
except we're not doing this virtually.

28
00:00:56,980 --> 00:00:59,150
She is right here in the flesh,

29
00:00:59,150 --> 00:01:00,020
in my house,

30
00:01:00,020 --> 00:01:01,410
Heather Lahtinen.

31
00:01:01,410 --> 00:01:03,500
welcome back to the podcast.

32
00:01:03,500 --> 00:01:05,760
Thank you so much for having me,

33
00:01:05,760 --> 00:01:06,990
not only on the podcast,

34
00:01:06,990 --> 00:01:08,460
but for hosting me in your home.

35
00:01:08,490 --> 00:01:11,400
I am physically in your home and I could not be

36
00:01:11,400 --> 00:01:14,460
happier. This is like the best vacation of my life.

37
00:01:14,490 --> 00:01:14,970
It's like,

38
00:01:15,060 --> 00:01:16,440
it's a work vacation,

39
00:01:16,620 --> 00:01:17,670
but we hang out,

40
00:01:17,670 --> 00:01:18,180
we talk,

41
00:01:18,180 --> 00:01:19,230
we eat good food.

42
00:01:19,230 --> 00:01:22,410
We go out on the lake and we get stuff done.

43
00:01:22,920 --> 00:01:26,520
Therefore, I have decided that I need to come here at

44
00:01:26,520 --> 00:01:27,600
least once per year,

45
00:01:27,750 --> 00:01:29,280
if not twice per year.

46
00:01:29,280 --> 00:01:30,480
So we're going to make that happen.

47
00:01:30,540 --> 00:01:30,900
Well, yeah,

48
00:01:30,900 --> 00:01:33,180
I think we should do once per year here and then

49
00:01:33,180 --> 00:01:34,740
once per year remote somewhere.

50
00:01:34,770 --> 00:01:35,550
Oh, Perfect.

51
00:01:35,580 --> 00:01:36,310
Yeah. Yeah.

52
00:01:36,390 --> 00:01:37,440
Okay. That's Great.

53
00:01:37,620 --> 00:01:39,900
Well, and I do want to say that you are very

54
00:01:39,930 --> 00:01:42,840
special because there's not just anybody.

55
00:01:42,840 --> 00:01:46,350
I would let into my house this week because this is

56
00:01:46,350 --> 00:01:49,740
the first time my daughter will be 15 this week.

57
00:01:50,490 --> 00:01:53,970
This is the first time I've been home in my house

58
00:01:54,180 --> 00:01:57,240
alone. Just me and the animals.

59
00:01:57,300 --> 00:01:59,270
Right? 15 years.

60
00:01:59,620 --> 00:02:00,750
That's a long time.

61
00:02:00,750 --> 00:02:01,350
And I take,

62
00:02:01,410 --> 00:02:05,130
I take this responsibility very serious because if I were in

63
00:02:05,130 --> 00:02:05,730
your shoes,

64
00:02:05,730 --> 00:02:07,140
I would absolutely want to be alone.

65
00:02:07,230 --> 00:02:09,060
I wouldn't want anyone bothering me.

66
00:02:09,060 --> 00:02:10,440
I would just want to get some work done,

67
00:02:10,530 --> 00:02:12,840
but we work so well together because well,

68
00:02:12,840 --> 00:02:14,280
we just like to work nonstop.

69
00:02:14,280 --> 00:02:17,910
So hopefully I didn't hinder your productivity.

70
00:02:18,030 --> 00:02:19,050
No, it's been awesome.

71
00:02:19,080 --> 00:02:19,800
It's been awesome.

72
00:02:20,370 --> 00:02:20,760
So yeah,

73
00:02:20,790 --> 00:02:22,350
so we figured since we're here,

74
00:02:22,470 --> 00:02:25,980
but together we should record a podcast episode or two.

75
00:02:25,980 --> 00:02:29,640
And actually this one might be a little bit quicker because

76
00:02:29,640 --> 00:02:34,320
I just wanted to talk about something that I think I've

77
00:02:34,320 --> 00:02:36,360
made a big progress over.

78
00:02:36,360 --> 00:02:39,150
I'm not going to say I'm overcome it yet,

79
00:02:39,480 --> 00:02:42,030
but I have made a big step forward.

80
00:02:42,300 --> 00:02:43,560
And that is,

81
00:02:43,890 --> 00:02:45,540
you guys might be surprised by this,

82
00:02:45,960 --> 00:02:47,340
but I'm actually,

83
00:02:48,600 --> 00:02:50,430
I'm not a white knuckle flyer,

84
00:02:50,760 --> 00:02:54,840
but I would be fine to not actually fly,

85
00:02:55,260 --> 00:02:58,860
but getting to somewhere is so reinforcing that therefore I get

86
00:02:58,860 --> 00:03:01,570
in uncomfortable space and will still fly.

87
00:03:01,780 --> 00:03:03,790
But if anything is out of the ordinary,

88
00:03:03,880 --> 00:03:04,630
I don't like it.

89
00:03:04,780 --> 00:03:06,040
I'm actually shocked by this.

90
00:03:06,040 --> 00:03:07,630
You shared this with me yesterday.

91
00:03:07,660 --> 00:03:09,850
And I looked at you as if you had three heads.

92
00:03:09,850 --> 00:03:10,360
And I said,

93
00:03:10,360 --> 00:03:11,050
wait, what?

94
00:03:11,440 --> 00:03:12,970
You have a fear of flying.

95
00:03:13,270 --> 00:03:14,110
Are you kidding?

96
00:03:14,350 --> 00:03:16,120
I did not know that about you.

97
00:03:16,780 --> 00:03:17,590
It's crazy.

98
00:03:17,590 --> 00:03:18,190
It's crazy.

99
00:03:18,190 --> 00:03:19,060
And so it's,

100
00:03:19,450 --> 00:03:19,870
and it's,

101
00:03:20,110 --> 00:03:22,150
I don't know nothing traumatic has happened,

102
00:03:22,150 --> 00:03:25,870
but I think it stems from you're completely out of control.

103
00:03:25,870 --> 00:03:26,410
Like you,

104
00:03:26,440 --> 00:03:29,500
you have no control in the outcome of the situation.

105
00:03:29,530 --> 00:03:33,070
You are just a passenger on this tube flying through the

106
00:03:33,070 --> 00:03:35,910
air. You have no idea if the situation is with them

107
00:03:35,920 --> 00:03:37,270
within normal limits upfront,

108
00:03:37,450 --> 00:03:41,230
or if they're freaking out or what is happening in,

109
00:03:41,230 --> 00:03:43,930
there's nothing you can do to fix the situation.

110
00:03:43,960 --> 00:03:44,770
Should it go sideways?

111
00:03:44,830 --> 00:03:45,560
Okay. But I,

112
00:03:45,560 --> 00:03:47,290
I have to question you on this.

113
00:03:47,320 --> 00:03:48,490
Isn't that true of life.

114
00:03:49,300 --> 00:03:51,970
Yeah. There's a lot of life where you don't have no

115
00:03:51,970 --> 00:03:52,930
control. That's true.

116
00:03:52,930 --> 00:03:53,500
But you're,

117
00:03:53,710 --> 00:03:55,750
you're in your life so often.

118
00:03:55,930 --> 00:03:57,070
And I know the statistics,

119
00:03:57,070 --> 00:03:57,310
I mean,

120
00:03:57,310 --> 00:03:59,230
it's way more dangerous for me to drive to the barn

121
00:03:59,230 --> 00:04:00,130
like this morning,

122
00:04:00,550 --> 00:04:02,920
but I don't know.

123
00:04:02,920 --> 00:04:04,780
There's something about being like 35,000

124
00:04:04,780 --> 00:04:06,400
feet in the air and being out of control that,

125
00:04:07,210 --> 00:04:08,050
That combination.

126
00:04:08,050 --> 00:04:09,730
Yes. That does it For you in a metal tube.

127
00:04:10,930 --> 00:04:12,310
Okay. So how did you,

128
00:04:12,430 --> 00:04:13,060
first of all,

129
00:04:13,090 --> 00:04:13,780
all your life.

130
00:04:15,760 --> 00:04:16,630
Yeah. Well,

131
00:04:16,960 --> 00:04:20,560
yeah, like if the plane ride is totally smooth and there's

132
00:04:20,560 --> 00:04:23,470
no turbulence and there's no 30 mile per hour cross winds,

133
00:04:23,710 --> 00:04:24,250
I'm like,

134
00:04:24,520 --> 00:04:25,630
whatever, this is cool.

135
00:04:25,630 --> 00:04:26,380
And I can actually,

136
00:04:26,380 --> 00:04:28,580
once we're up and we're cruising and I'm looking down and

137
00:04:28,590 --> 00:04:28,840
I'm like,

138
00:04:28,840 --> 00:04:29,890
oh, it's super peaceful.

139
00:04:29,890 --> 00:04:33,340
Like, and I actually feel inspired like working on a plane.

140
00:04:33,340 --> 00:04:36,790
Like I love it because I think of what I have

141
00:04:36,790 --> 00:04:39,940
equated being on a plane to,

142
00:04:40,120 --> 00:04:41,590
which is freedom,

143
00:04:41,590 --> 00:04:43,900
freedom, and travel,

144
00:04:44,110 --> 00:04:46,120
and even work travel,

145
00:04:46,120 --> 00:04:47,020
which I love.

146
00:04:47,020 --> 00:04:50,380
And so all these things that I love on the other

147
00:04:50,380 --> 00:04:51,100
side of a plane ride,

148
00:04:51,130 --> 00:04:53,770
right. So there's been a lot of positive reinforcement,

149
00:04:53,830 --> 00:04:58,180
right. Pairing onto that particular outcome.

150
00:04:58,570 --> 00:04:59,980
But I,

151
00:04:59,980 --> 00:05:02,260
well, and then on the other side of it too,

152
00:05:02,380 --> 00:05:04,990
like I'm kind of obsessed with the aviation industry.

153
00:05:04,990 --> 00:05:07,720
Like I love playing like fascinating.

154
00:05:07,720 --> 00:05:10,000
Yeah. The we're actually over a flight path or under a

155
00:05:10,000 --> 00:05:10,540
flight path,

156
00:05:11,110 --> 00:05:11,380
you know,

157
00:05:11,380 --> 00:05:14,980
for when the planes are landing and going south at Charlotte,

158
00:05:15,490 --> 00:05:17,500
depending on how many planes they have backed up.

159
00:05:17,500 --> 00:05:18,940
Sometimes they fly right over our house.

160
00:05:19,450 --> 00:05:21,490
I learned all this cause my brother's in a pilot for

161
00:05:21,490 --> 00:05:22,630
American out of Charlotte.

162
00:05:22,630 --> 00:05:23,980
So he tells me all the things like,

163
00:05:23,980 --> 00:05:25,060
yeah, fly over your house all the time.

164
00:05:25,420 --> 00:05:26,020
But anyway,

165
00:05:26,560 --> 00:05:28,360
they start coming in like kind of low and slow.

166
00:05:28,360 --> 00:05:28,780
And you're just like,

167
00:05:28,810 --> 00:05:30,340
ah, I wonder where that plan's coming from.

168
00:05:30,370 --> 00:05:31,270
Ooh, that's a big one.

169
00:05:31,300 --> 00:05:32,200
Oh, that's a little one.

170
00:05:32,230 --> 00:05:32,890
Oh, that's this,

171
00:05:32,920 --> 00:05:33,370
that's that?

172
00:05:33,370 --> 00:05:33,850
And I just,

173
00:05:34,030 --> 00:05:34,420
I don't know.

174
00:05:34,420 --> 00:05:35,140
It's fascinating.

175
00:05:35,140 --> 00:05:36,340
Every time there's a plane in the sky,

176
00:05:36,340 --> 00:05:38,890
I have to stop and like look at it and kind

177
00:05:38,890 --> 00:05:40,510
of Marvel at it for a moment.

178
00:05:42,070 --> 00:05:43,210
So, well,

179
00:05:43,270 --> 00:05:44,170
the fear of flying,

180
00:05:44,170 --> 00:05:44,890
I think,

181
00:05:45,490 --> 00:05:45,790
you know,

182
00:05:45,790 --> 00:05:46,300
it's always,

183
00:05:46,300 --> 00:05:47,350
when there's these weird things,

184
00:05:47,350 --> 00:05:47,620
it's like,

185
00:05:47,650 --> 00:05:49,450
oh, that's a lot of turbulence that seems stressful.

186
00:05:50,470 --> 00:05:54,460
But I had this reoccurring dream of being on a flight

187
00:05:54,460 --> 00:05:55,600
and you're sitting with the window seat,

188
00:05:55,600 --> 00:05:57,470
which is where I like to sit in plane,

189
00:05:57,470 --> 00:05:57,710
you know,

190
00:05:57,710 --> 00:06:00,110
when they bank and they're turning and you're like looking straight

191
00:06:00,110 --> 00:06:00,560
out your window,

192
00:06:00,560 --> 00:06:02,930
but it's down towards the ground or doing that.

193
00:06:02,990 --> 00:06:05,300
But it's getting closer and closer and closer to the ground.

194
00:06:05,300 --> 00:06:07,550
So it's basically in this like death spiral down to the

195
00:06:07,550 --> 00:06:08,540
ground and I realized,

196
00:06:08,570 --> 00:06:10,910
oh, I guess it's over.

197
00:06:10,910 --> 00:06:12,380
And I'm super peaceful in my dream,

198
00:06:12,710 --> 00:06:15,380
but I always wake up before we actually hit the ground.

199
00:06:15,500 --> 00:06:16,070
But then,

200
00:06:16,070 --> 00:06:16,370
you know,

201
00:06:16,370 --> 00:06:17,300
I start to think,

202
00:06:17,660 --> 00:06:18,710
is this a premonition?

203
00:06:18,950 --> 00:06:20,210
Like, should,

204
00:06:20,270 --> 00:06:21,770
should I be nervous about flying?

205
00:06:21,770 --> 00:06:23,150
Cause that's pretty stressful.

206
00:06:24,020 --> 00:06:25,970
And yeah,

207
00:06:26,030 --> 00:06:26,690
I don't Know.

208
00:06:26,690 --> 00:06:29,720
Or just a manifestation of the fear It may be.

209
00:06:29,780 --> 00:06:31,550
And I think it is too,

210
00:06:31,550 --> 00:06:35,000
because your subconscious mind takes things that you are like that,

211
00:06:35,000 --> 00:06:35,900
you know,

212
00:06:36,020 --> 00:06:38,660
so like somebody else might have a reoccurring dream.

213
00:06:38,660 --> 00:06:41,300
That means absolutely nothing to do with transportation,

214
00:06:41,630 --> 00:06:43,550
but they have another main,

215
00:06:43,670 --> 00:06:45,770
like that's the main character kind of,

216
00:06:45,800 --> 00:06:47,810
even though it has actually nothing to do with that.

217
00:06:48,140 --> 00:06:48,710
Oh right.

218
00:06:49,010 --> 00:06:49,700
And I mean,

219
00:06:49,700 --> 00:06:50,060
it could mean,

220
00:06:50,060 --> 00:06:51,470
so it could mean something totally different.

221
00:06:51,530 --> 00:06:55,220
Right? This could be something about a fear you have in

222
00:06:55,220 --> 00:06:57,410
your business or with money or,

223
00:06:57,410 --> 00:06:57,680
I mean,

224
00:06:57,680 --> 00:06:58,430
who knows,

225
00:06:58,730 --> 00:07:00,500
but it's just manifesting in something that,

226
00:07:00,500 --> 00:07:00,830
you know,

227
00:07:00,830 --> 00:07:03,440
something that's familiar and seems fairly straightforward.

228
00:07:03,470 --> 00:07:05,270
Like if the plane crashes I die.

229
00:07:06,290 --> 00:07:07,370
Right. That's it,

230
00:07:07,730 --> 00:07:08,450
that's interesting.

231
00:07:08,450 --> 00:07:09,560
You use the word premonition.

232
00:07:09,560 --> 00:07:12,170
I was listening to a podcast recently on one of these

233
00:07:12,170 --> 00:07:15,320
docu series on a gentlemen who at the age of 19

234
00:07:15,530 --> 00:07:18,200
had two very vivid dreams.

235
00:07:18,560 --> 00:07:19,490
And in the dreams,

236
00:07:19,490 --> 00:07:20,960
he, one of the dreams,

237
00:07:21,230 --> 00:07:22,730
it was the same night and the first dream,

238
00:07:22,730 --> 00:07:26,570
he was in this very remote location with mountains.

239
00:07:26,570 --> 00:07:28,610
And, and he had this dream that they were,

240
00:07:28,670 --> 00:07:29,440
they came around a bed,

241
00:07:29,480 --> 00:07:30,440
they saw these certain trees.

242
00:07:30,440 --> 00:07:31,070
Okay. Whatever.

243
00:07:31,430 --> 00:07:32,780
And then in the next dream,

244
00:07:33,080 --> 00:07:35,240
it was very clearly shown to him that he was going

245
00:07:35,240 --> 00:07:36,680
to die at the age of 52.

246
00:07:37,190 --> 00:07:37,520
So then,

247
00:07:37,580 --> 00:07:39,110
so the number 52 kept coming.

248
00:07:39,110 --> 00:07:39,890
So he's 19.

249
00:07:40,280 --> 00:07:42,260
So the number 52 kept coming up and it,

250
00:07:42,320 --> 00:07:44,900
and it was repeated in the dream as when he would

251
00:07:44,900 --> 00:07:45,410
die. Okay.

252
00:07:45,440 --> 00:07:45,980
But he woke up,

253
00:07:45,980 --> 00:07:48,320
he didn't think anything of it until three or four years

254
00:07:48,320 --> 00:07:50,460
later, he's on this adventure,

255
00:07:50,470 --> 00:07:55,160
something in Alaska with a guide and they hit this corner

256
00:07:55,190 --> 00:07:56,210
in this glacier.

257
00:07:56,240 --> 00:07:56,840
And he said,

258
00:07:56,840 --> 00:07:57,710
I've been here.

259
00:07:58,430 --> 00:08:01,220
And it was his exact dream from when he was 19.

260
00:08:01,550 --> 00:08:03,710
Wow. So when that happened,

261
00:08:04,070 --> 00:08:04,790
he thought,

262
00:08:04,820 --> 00:08:06,740
well, the rest of the dream was a.at

263
00:08:06,740 --> 00:08:08,260
52. So my get,

264
00:08:08,270 --> 00:08:09,290
so this was in his twenties.

265
00:08:09,710 --> 00:08:10,340
He's like,

266
00:08:10,700 --> 00:08:12,110
I'm going to die at 52.

267
00:08:12,200 --> 00:08:15,620
I am almost convinced like a hundred percent certain that's going

268
00:08:15,620 --> 00:08:16,040
to happen.

269
00:08:16,370 --> 00:08:16,940
So the,

270
00:08:17,180 --> 00:08:18,350
I forget what podcasts,

271
00:08:18,350 --> 00:08:18,710
this was on.

272
00:08:18,710 --> 00:08:22,280
He was being interviewed and he was at the time 50

273
00:08:22,340 --> 00:08:23,060
or 51.

274
00:08:23,630 --> 00:08:25,250
And he had not told a single person,

275
00:08:25,250 --> 00:08:27,770
his entire life about these dreams.

276
00:08:27,920 --> 00:08:28,550
He has a wife,

277
00:08:28,550 --> 00:08:29,300
he has children.

278
00:08:29,300 --> 00:08:31,820
He just didn't want to worry them because what if it's

279
00:08:31,820 --> 00:08:35,000
just one of these random dreams and they followed up with

280
00:08:35,000 --> 00:08:38,390
him and last I heard he was 52 and still alive.

281
00:08:39,380 --> 00:08:42,350
But I'm actually following this story because is,

282
00:08:42,380 --> 00:08:44,930
are you prophesying about the future?

283
00:08:45,440 --> 00:08:47,450
Is it a premonition or,

284
00:08:48,220 --> 00:08:50,210
or is it just a random jury?

285
00:08:50,390 --> 00:08:51,320
Right, right,

286
00:08:51,380 --> 00:08:52,100
right. Well,

287
00:08:52,100 --> 00:08:54,890
and then I would like to kick it another step forward.

288
00:08:54,890 --> 00:08:58,680
If, start to tell yourself for 30 years is what's going

289
00:08:58,680 --> 00:09:00,390
to happen to you then,

290
00:09:00,390 --> 00:09:02,160
are you kind of calling that into existence?

291
00:09:02,340 --> 00:09:03,030
A hundred percent?

292
00:09:03,030 --> 00:09:04,050
Yes. I thought the same thing.

293
00:09:04,080 --> 00:09:04,470
I thought,

294
00:09:04,470 --> 00:09:06,570
if this guy wasn't going to die at 52,

295
00:09:06,660 --> 00:09:09,150
he probably is because he's speaking into existence,

296
00:09:09,450 --> 00:09:12,870
meaning some accident is going to happen and it's going to

297
00:09:12,870 --> 00:09:13,470
be like safe.

298
00:09:13,500 --> 00:09:13,710
I mean,

299
00:09:13,710 --> 00:09:14,160
he'll be dead,

300
00:09:14,190 --> 00:09:16,920
but it will be just prove to him that it was

301
00:09:16,920 --> 00:09:19,740
true. It's it's the whole story is just a trip.

302
00:09:19,770 --> 00:09:21,570
I actually need to look him up because I think he's

303
00:09:21,570 --> 00:09:22,860
turning 53 soon.

304
00:09:22,920 --> 00:09:26,160
He was convinced he was either going to die his 51st

305
00:09:26,160 --> 00:09:29,610
year into his 52nd or right around 52.

306
00:09:29,940 --> 00:09:30,570
So anyway,

307
00:09:30,600 --> 00:09:31,920
I'll look it up and report back.

308
00:09:31,950 --> 00:09:35,250
But interesting how we think these dreams,

309
00:09:35,310 --> 00:09:38,610
I always want to assign meaning to dream everything.

310
00:09:38,880 --> 00:09:40,290
Right? You want to make sense of it.

311
00:09:40,290 --> 00:09:42,420
So the death spiral in the plane,

312
00:09:42,450 --> 00:09:45,270
the obvious answer is I'm going to die in a plane

313
00:09:45,270 --> 00:09:46,540
crash. Right.

314
00:09:46,860 --> 00:09:49,350
But because we know that's not how the subconscious works.

315
00:09:50,070 --> 00:09:52,110
It actually can't be that right.

316
00:09:52,530 --> 00:09:54,120
It has to be something else.

317
00:09:54,150 --> 00:09:56,580
Right. Which we have not uncovered because we've been talking about

318
00:09:56,580 --> 00:09:57,510
this for the past day.

319
00:09:57,540 --> 00:10:02,880
But It also another kind of differentiator too,

320
00:10:02,910 --> 00:10:06,930
is if you are like getting on something,

321
00:10:06,930 --> 00:10:07,740
like getting on the plane,

322
00:10:07,740 --> 00:10:08,370
for instance,

323
00:10:08,370 --> 00:10:10,350
and like this manifests for me before,

324
00:10:10,350 --> 00:10:11,490
especially a big flight,

325
00:10:11,610 --> 00:10:13,350
especially if I'm flying by myself,

326
00:10:13,530 --> 00:10:14,130
because then I'm like,

327
00:10:14,130 --> 00:10:15,390
well, my family can't live without me,

328
00:10:15,390 --> 00:10:16,200
but for all together,

329
00:10:16,200 --> 00:10:17,280
at least we all die together.

330
00:10:17,280 --> 00:10:17,910
So terrible.

331
00:10:17,910 --> 00:10:19,050
Then I just worry about the animals.

332
00:10:20,220 --> 00:10:22,020
I can't really take my horse on the plane,

333
00:10:22,560 --> 00:10:23,760
especially now that we have to.

334
00:10:23,910 --> 00:10:24,630
But anyway,

335
00:10:26,850 --> 00:10:30,270
one of the ways to kind of differentiate is whether this

336
00:10:30,270 --> 00:10:32,520
is like kind of a fear of phobia,

337
00:10:32,550 --> 00:10:36,750
like conscious mind versus like a deeper message is if there

338
00:10:36,750 --> 00:10:39,660
is like tightness in your chest and you're getting those actual

339
00:10:39,660 --> 00:10:41,400
fear, stress responses,

340
00:10:41,700 --> 00:10:43,920
like it's not a premonition,

341
00:10:44,040 --> 00:10:46,230
like premonitions are,

342
00:10:46,890 --> 00:10:47,160
you know,

343
00:10:47,160 --> 00:10:47,580
it's just like,

344
00:10:47,670 --> 00:10:48,600
oh, I mean,

345
00:10:48,600 --> 00:10:49,440
it sounds like that guy,

346
00:10:49,440 --> 00:10:50,280
but that was a dream.

347
00:10:50,280 --> 00:10:50,970
I think dreams are,

348
00:10:51,000 --> 00:10:52,590
like we said a whole different animal,

349
00:10:52,620 --> 00:10:52,980
but like,

350
00:10:52,980 --> 00:10:55,200
if you're nervous about getting on a plane and you're about

351
00:10:55,200 --> 00:10:55,560
to get on,

352
00:10:55,570 --> 00:10:56,010
you're like,

353
00:10:56,310 --> 00:10:57,480
Ooh, heart's beating fast.

354
00:10:57,510 --> 00:10:58,080
Oh, this means,

355
00:10:58,080 --> 00:10:58,650
this must mean,

356
00:10:58,770 --> 00:11:00,630
this must mean I had this bad thought,

357
00:11:00,630 --> 00:11:00,870
blah, blah,

358
00:11:00,870 --> 00:11:01,290
blah. You know,

359
00:11:01,290 --> 00:11:01,770
I'm out.

360
00:11:01,980 --> 00:11:03,780
Usually just are Right.

361
00:11:03,840 --> 00:11:04,260
Our fear.

362
00:11:04,320 --> 00:11:04,770
It's just,

363
00:11:04,800 --> 00:11:06,360
it's just a straight up fear,

364
00:11:06,360 --> 00:11:07,080
which makes sense.

365
00:11:07,080 --> 00:11:07,410
I mean,

366
00:11:07,470 --> 00:11:09,210
a lot of people have a fear of flying fear of

367
00:11:09,210 --> 00:11:10,020
Heights. These are,

368
00:11:10,230 --> 00:11:10,530
I think,

369
00:11:10,530 --> 00:11:13,060
normal human fears because of the control issue.

370
00:11:13,080 --> 00:11:14,310
Yeah. But I'm thinking,

371
00:11:14,310 --> 00:11:14,490
you know,

372
00:11:14,490 --> 00:11:17,160
as we bring this around to business and the fear of

373
00:11:17,160 --> 00:11:17,880
starting a business,

374
00:11:17,880 --> 00:11:18,780
getting clients,

375
00:11:19,410 --> 00:11:19,620
you know,

376
00:11:19,620 --> 00:11:20,280
your pricing,

377
00:11:20,280 --> 00:11:21,330
sales, sales,

378
00:11:21,330 --> 00:11:24,060
raising your price is a lot of people will say,

379
00:11:24,090 --> 00:11:25,530
they will say directly to your face.

380
00:11:25,620 --> 00:11:27,450
Nicole, I'm afraid to charge that.

381
00:11:28,230 --> 00:11:31,260
And that is probably true.

382
00:11:31,920 --> 00:11:33,390
There's probably a component of,

383
00:11:33,390 --> 00:11:34,920
yes, I'm afraid to charge that,

384
00:11:35,550 --> 00:11:37,110
but then there's like this,

385
00:11:37,140 --> 00:11:37,470
you know,

386
00:11:37,470 --> 00:11:39,720
am I worth it and value and competence and all of

387
00:11:39,720 --> 00:11:40,320
those things.

388
00:11:40,410 --> 00:11:46,170
I actually believe that there's probably something deeper there that we

389
00:11:46,170 --> 00:11:49,020
would have to really talk through to uncover.

390
00:11:49,170 --> 00:11:51,030
Yes. It's fear of rejection for sure.

391
00:11:51,030 --> 00:11:52,800
Everyone has that to some degree,

392
00:11:52,800 --> 00:11:53,980
some work through it some day.

393
00:11:54,130 --> 00:11:58,270
Right. But do you think that it could actually be a

394
00:11:58,270 --> 00:12:03,820
fear that is seemingly so different or unrelated that is manifesting

395
00:12:03,850 --> 00:12:05,740
is a fear around pricing?

396
00:12:05,830 --> 00:12:07,330
I mean there's probably multiple angles.

397
00:12:08,290 --> 00:12:09,820
Absolutely. I mean it could be,

398
00:12:11,050 --> 00:12:11,410
huh? Yeah.

399
00:12:11,440 --> 00:12:13,840
Yeah. I mean the rejection is the obvious one,

400
00:12:14,110 --> 00:12:16,900
but, But I think it comes down to at least for

401
00:12:16,900 --> 00:12:18,340
pricing and sales.

402
00:12:18,400 --> 00:12:20,800
I think most of the fears stem from how are people

403
00:12:20,800 --> 00:12:22,690
perceiving me and how are they going to judge me?

404
00:12:22,990 --> 00:12:24,490
And you know,

405
00:12:24,550 --> 00:12:26,980
we've talked about so many money stories on this podcast,

406
00:12:27,010 --> 00:12:29,650
that those money beliefs that you have,

407
00:12:29,650 --> 00:12:31,720
like this is to profile superfluous.

408
00:12:31,810 --> 00:12:32,860
I used to not be able to say that word,

409
00:12:33,280 --> 00:12:33,640
you know,

410
00:12:33,640 --> 00:12:34,330
or this is like,

411
00:12:34,330 --> 00:12:34,780
you know,

412
00:12:34,840 --> 00:12:36,790
bougie or extra and this or that.

413
00:12:36,790 --> 00:12:37,360
And you know,

414
00:12:37,360 --> 00:12:41,470
why, how can I ask people to spend this much money?

415
00:12:41,800 --> 00:12:43,480
Ah, they just want pictures of their dog.

416
00:12:43,750 --> 00:12:45,340
They could take a picture of their dog with their cell

417
00:12:45,340 --> 00:12:45,940
phone, right?

418
00:12:45,940 --> 00:12:49,990
Like you're providing a whole different level of service that deserves

419
00:12:49,990 --> 00:12:51,100
to be compensated for,

420
00:12:51,100 --> 00:12:53,410
and the amount of time and effort that you've put into

421
00:12:53,410 --> 00:12:56,860
learning how to perfect your craft also deserves to be compensated

422
00:12:56,860 --> 00:12:57,790
for. But yeah,

423
00:12:57,790 --> 00:12:59,590
I think it all stems to,

424
00:13:00,160 --> 00:13:01,420
are people going to judge me,

425
00:13:01,420 --> 00:13:03,130
are they going to kick me out of the tribe and

426
00:13:03,130 --> 00:13:04,120
therefore I'm going to die.

427
00:13:04,240 --> 00:13:04,450
All right.

428
00:13:04,450 --> 00:13:06,760
I'll starve and die and never be accepted again.

429
00:13:07,150 --> 00:13:09,400
So when people come to me and say that they're stuck,

430
00:13:09,460 --> 00:13:12,280
I will usually ask what's the challenge you are facing.

431
00:13:12,520 --> 00:13:15,100
And then they might describe raising their prices or putting themselves

432
00:13:15,100 --> 00:13:15,520
out there.

433
00:13:15,670 --> 00:13:16,270
And I'll say,

434
00:13:16,300 --> 00:13:17,440
okay, what's the fear.

435
00:13:18,190 --> 00:13:19,000
And sometimes they,

436
00:13:19,000 --> 00:13:19,420
you know,

437
00:13:19,450 --> 00:13:21,670
they know it and sometimes they don't and it takes a

438
00:13:21,670 --> 00:13:24,910
minute, but if you can name the fear and say,

439
00:13:24,940 --> 00:13:29,170
okay, I have this fear of rejection or judgment that Which

440
00:13:29,170 --> 00:13:30,880
is really rejection,

441
00:13:30,910 --> 00:13:31,920
the judgment that would lead to.

442
00:13:32,860 --> 00:13:33,550
Right, right.

443
00:13:33,550 --> 00:13:34,210
In that regard.

444
00:13:34,360 --> 00:13:36,070
So if you can name that and say,

445
00:13:36,070 --> 00:13:37,540
okay, it's a fear of rejection.

446
00:13:37,540 --> 00:13:38,770
It's a fear of judgment.

447
00:13:39,670 --> 00:13:41,380
A lot of people just stop there and yet,

448
00:13:41,380 --> 00:13:41,740
and they're like,

449
00:13:41,740 --> 00:13:42,820
yes, that's what I fear.

450
00:13:42,880 --> 00:13:44,890
My next question is,

451
00:13:45,070 --> 00:13:46,420
can you be okay with that?

452
00:13:46,480 --> 00:13:48,520
Right. Can you be okay?

453
00:13:48,700 --> 00:13:53,380
Is it more important for you to not fly or to

454
00:13:53,380 --> 00:13:55,180
get to your incredible destination?

455
00:13:56,400 --> 00:13:58,960
You, you see the value at the end.

456
00:13:59,140 --> 00:14:00,190
So I will ask someone,

457
00:14:00,220 --> 00:14:01,150
oh, you want to leave your job?

458
00:14:01,180 --> 00:14:02,590
You want to make money in pet photography.

459
00:14:02,680 --> 00:14:06,490
Okay. Is that more important to you than protecting your ego?

460
00:14:06,730 --> 00:14:07,780
Right, Right.

461
00:14:07,810 --> 00:14:09,100
Whoa. Okay.

462
00:14:09,160 --> 00:14:12,520
Because what you're doing is playing safe to protect your ego

463
00:14:12,640 --> 00:14:13,630
from your feelings,

464
00:14:13,630 --> 00:14:14,320
getting hurt,

465
00:14:14,350 --> 00:14:16,120
which I'm not making light of.

466
00:14:16,120 --> 00:14:16,960
It's very serious,

467
00:14:17,440 --> 00:14:19,630
but what's more important to you to stay safe,

468
00:14:19,630 --> 00:14:20,710
small, protected,

469
00:14:20,710 --> 00:14:21,910
and miserable in your corporate job.

470
00:14:21,940 --> 00:14:25,600
Is that more important to you or is following your dream,

471
00:14:25,600 --> 00:14:26,530
pursuing your passion,

472
00:14:26,530 --> 00:14:28,090
delivering an incredible service.

473
00:14:28,180 --> 00:14:29,770
So then if you look at those two things,

474
00:14:29,770 --> 00:14:30,190
of course,

475
00:14:30,190 --> 00:14:31,000
other of course,

476
00:14:31,150 --> 00:14:32,050
I want to follow my dream.

477
00:14:32,080 --> 00:14:38,110
Okay. Can you be okay with the possibility or the potential

478
00:14:38,110 --> 00:14:39,370
of being rejected?

479
00:14:39,550 --> 00:14:41,860
Because if you can answer yes to that,

480
00:14:41,950 --> 00:14:45,250
you can free yourself up and let go to some degree

481
00:14:45,490 --> 00:14:48,130
or at least enough of that fear to move forward.

482
00:14:48,160 --> 00:14:51,470
Yep. Which is exactly what I did when we were in

483
00:14:51,470 --> 00:14:53,060
Italy just a couple of weeks ago.

484
00:14:53,300 --> 00:14:54,290
And you know,

485
00:14:54,350 --> 00:14:56,690
part of this is I know too much.

486
00:14:57,950 --> 00:14:59,510
So I'm looking and I'm like,

487
00:14:59,510 --> 00:15:02,930
man flying United us Boeing 7 67.

488
00:15:02,930 --> 00:15:03,380
I'm like,

489
00:15:03,380 --> 00:15:05,810
God, all the other airlines retired that plane.

490
00:15:05,810 --> 00:15:07,670
I don't know anyone still flying that.

491
00:15:07,670 --> 00:15:09,200
It's like one of those old ones where you went in

492
00:15:09,200 --> 00:15:12,020
to use the bathroom and they still have the ashtray in

493
00:15:12,020 --> 00:15:12,620
the bathroom.

494
00:15:12,620 --> 00:15:12,890
I'm like,

495
00:15:13,760 --> 00:15:15,440
how many decades is smoking?

496
00:15:15,440 --> 00:15:16,850
Not been allowed on planes?

497
00:15:17,210 --> 00:15:18,860
I think almost my whole entire lifetime.

498
00:15:19,040 --> 00:15:19,460
So anyway,

499
00:15:19,460 --> 00:15:19,790
so I'm like,

500
00:15:19,850 --> 00:15:20,270
oh God,

501
00:15:20,270 --> 00:15:21,230
this is an old plane.

502
00:15:21,650 --> 00:15:22,190
Which again,

503
00:15:22,190 --> 00:15:23,180
you look at the statistics.

504
00:15:23,180 --> 00:15:24,830
I don't even think that plane's ever crashed.

505
00:15:25,640 --> 00:15:28,700
Like it's a super safe airline or a super safe airplane.

506
00:15:28,880 --> 00:15:31,910
And then we were flying a regional jet from Newark to

507
00:15:31,910 --> 00:15:33,020
Charlotte, which again,

508
00:15:33,080 --> 00:15:33,680
super safe,

509
00:15:33,710 --> 00:15:37,220
but slightly more skiddish and uncomfortable in the air because they

510
00:15:37,220 --> 00:15:37,970
move around a bit more.

511
00:15:38,270 --> 00:15:38,840
But anyway,

512
00:15:39,080 --> 00:15:39,590
and like,

513
00:15:39,590 --> 00:15:41,630
it was like our last day in Italy and I'm just

514
00:15:41,630 --> 00:15:45,350
like, I can feel the stress in my chest.

515
00:15:45,350 --> 00:15:45,980
I'm just like,

516
00:15:46,100 --> 00:15:47,360
oh, I gotta take this flight.

517
00:15:47,420 --> 00:15:48,290
Oh, it's a long flight.

518
00:15:48,290 --> 00:15:49,430
It's over a lot of ocean.

519
00:15:49,430 --> 00:15:51,080
There's no place to lay on the Ocean.

520
00:15:51,320 --> 00:15:54,110
Yes. And then it occurred to me.

521
00:15:54,140 --> 00:15:54,830
It was like,

522
00:15:55,880 --> 00:15:56,480
all right.

523
00:15:57,050 --> 00:15:59,210
So say I did find out that like,

524
00:15:59,240 --> 00:15:59,510
oh yeah,

525
00:15:59,510 --> 00:16:01,100
that dream actually will happen.

526
00:16:01,400 --> 00:16:02,270
But you don't know when.

527
00:16:02,330 --> 00:16:03,830
Right. You don't know when it could be when you're like

528
00:16:03,830 --> 00:16:05,300
95. Oh Right.

529
00:16:05,530 --> 00:16:09,650
Would I want to live my whole entire life?

530
00:16:09,740 --> 00:16:11,360
Never getting on a plane again.

531
00:16:11,990 --> 00:16:14,060
And the answer unequivocally was hell no.

532
00:16:14,090 --> 00:16:15,470
That's And re question,

533
00:16:15,480 --> 00:16:16,340
ask yourself,

534
00:16:16,730 --> 00:16:20,840
would I want to live staying in Charlotte or within driving

535
00:16:20,840 --> 00:16:23,690
distance of wherever I could go.

536
00:16:23,690 --> 00:16:25,520
But that's a great question.

537
00:16:25,760 --> 00:16:26,780
If you ask yourself,

538
00:16:26,780 --> 00:16:28,310
am I okay?

539
00:16:28,340 --> 00:16:32,330
Because here's the thing you will always regret not taking action,

540
00:16:32,960 --> 00:16:36,320
but you will never regret taking the action.

541
00:16:36,350 --> 00:16:37,010
Did I say that right?

542
00:16:37,010 --> 00:16:37,880
Yeah. You will.

543
00:16:37,910 --> 00:16:38,480
You will not.

544
00:16:38,720 --> 00:16:40,340
Unless your plane actually does crash.

545
00:16:40,340 --> 00:16:41,540
So you might've got a for a minute,

546
00:16:41,720 --> 00:16:44,030
but You really wouldn't know.

547
00:16:44,030 --> 00:16:44,270
I mean,

548
00:16:44,270 --> 00:16:45,710
I think it would be over so quickly.

549
00:16:45,710 --> 00:16:46,460
It would be disliked,

550
00:16:47,870 --> 00:16:49,130
But it really truly did help.

551
00:16:49,130 --> 00:16:50,780
Cause I came home from Italy and I was only home

552
00:16:50,780 --> 00:16:51,320
for a week.

553
00:16:51,500 --> 00:16:54,830
And then I was flying out to Montana for a mastermind

554
00:16:54,830 --> 00:16:57,260
meeting of other online business owners.

555
00:16:57,620 --> 00:16:59,810
And the night before I left,

556
00:17:00,080 --> 00:17:03,710
I checked the weather real quick and I saw a high

557
00:17:03,710 --> 00:17:04,820
wind warning in Bozeman.

558
00:17:04,820 --> 00:17:10,490
The next day I went warning.

559
00:17:10,880 --> 00:17:13,160
And so that again,

560
00:17:13,160 --> 00:17:14,150
too much information,

561
00:17:14,150 --> 00:17:15,350
I start digging and I'm like,

562
00:17:15,470 --> 00:17:16,310
how much?

563
00:17:16,310 --> 00:17:18,320
And then I find like the website that tells you the

564
00:17:18,320 --> 00:17:22,760
actual like field conditions at the airport and which direction I'm

565
00:17:22,760 --> 00:17:23,330
looking up.

566
00:17:23,360 --> 00:17:25,100
Okay. This runway is 20 R,

567
00:17:25,100 --> 00:17:26,030
which is two 80.

568
00:17:26,030 --> 00:17:29,480
Like I Right now Sound like,

569
00:17:29,660 --> 00:17:30,920
oh, this are not going to be on.

570
00:17:30,920 --> 00:17:33,020
Like, I hope this is like east west facing runway.

571
00:17:33,050 --> 00:17:33,590
Oh no.

572
00:17:33,590 --> 00:17:35,960
It's north of south till I start to get in my

573
00:17:35,960 --> 00:17:37,940
car In the world is happening.

574
00:17:37,970 --> 00:17:38,840
Are you insane?

575
00:17:38,840 --> 00:17:39,950
Why would you do that?

576
00:17:39,980 --> 00:17:41,390
Why would you look it up?

577
00:17:41,420 --> 00:17:44,540
Well, I just looked at the weather and my no,

578
00:17:44,600 --> 00:17:45,830
No. So,

579
00:17:46,280 --> 00:17:47,960
okay. If you look at the weather to determine,

580
00:17:47,960 --> 00:17:48,770
do I need a jacket?

581
00:17:48,830 --> 00:17:49,350
Right. Okay.

582
00:17:49,350 --> 00:17:49,920
That's fair.

583
00:17:50,040 --> 00:17:53,520
Looking at the temperature Thing.

584
00:17:53,520 --> 00:17:54,720
When you go to the weather channel,

585
00:17:54,720 --> 00:17:55,500
when there's a,

586
00:17:55,660 --> 00:17:59,250
a weather situation it's like flashing red Murph and it said

587
00:17:59,250 --> 00:18:00,450
high wind warning.

588
00:18:01,740 --> 00:18:03,750
Maybe you should've just asked your husband,

589
00:18:03,750 --> 00:18:04,870
Hey, tell me what the temperature is.

590
00:18:05,250 --> 00:18:06,600
Maybe I'll do that next time.

591
00:18:06,690 --> 00:18:07,710
Maybe I'll do that next time.

592
00:18:08,160 --> 00:18:09,450
Although truly.

593
00:18:09,450 --> 00:18:09,960
And then I,

594
00:18:09,960 --> 00:18:10,350
you know,

595
00:18:10,350 --> 00:18:12,420
I'm like how high of a crosswind complains,

596
00:18:12,420 --> 00:18:13,140
Landon, blah,

597
00:18:13,140 --> 00:18:13,590
blah, blah.

598
00:18:13,920 --> 00:18:16,350
And so then I'm reading like how the pilots actually do

599
00:18:16,350 --> 00:18:18,240
and they have to put down anyway.

600
00:18:18,300 --> 00:18:18,930
Like I said,

601
00:18:18,960 --> 00:18:22,320
I'm, I I'm super fascinated by it all,

602
00:18:22,650 --> 00:18:23,910
but almost to a fault,

603
00:18:24,780 --> 00:18:26,160
but you would be so proud of me.

604
00:18:26,190 --> 00:18:26,820
Cause I was like,

605
00:18:26,850 --> 00:18:27,150
all right,

606
00:18:27,150 --> 00:18:29,520
well, I made the decision to go to this,

607
00:18:30,360 --> 00:18:30,630
you know,

608
00:18:30,630 --> 00:18:34,110
like I'm I I'm going like planes,

609
00:18:34,110 --> 00:18:35,700
land, freaking Bozeman all the time.

610
00:18:35,700 --> 00:18:37,800
And plants are going to be landing in these conditions all

611
00:18:37,800 --> 00:18:38,790
day long,

612
00:18:38,910 --> 00:18:39,510
all day.

613
00:18:39,600 --> 00:18:41,580
I'm actually not heard of a plane crash in Bozeman.

614
00:18:41,760 --> 00:18:42,570
Yeah. Also,

615
00:18:45,360 --> 00:18:45,840
But anyway,

616
00:18:45,840 --> 00:18:46,140
I'm like,

617
00:18:46,140 --> 00:18:48,120
there'll be landing in here all day and if it's not

618
00:18:48,120 --> 00:18:49,710
safe, then we'll go land somewhere else.

619
00:18:50,820 --> 00:18:51,690
Yeah, Exactly.

620
00:18:52,020 --> 00:18:53,040
And so anyway,

621
00:18:53,060 --> 00:18:55,050
so we're on the plane and it's a little bit delayed

622
00:18:55,050 --> 00:18:55,650
and you know,

623
00:18:55,650 --> 00:18:59,490
they had some other FAA timeout for the crew thing,

624
00:18:59,490 --> 00:19:02,220
whatever. So we finally got going and the pilots like,

625
00:19:02,250 --> 00:19:02,490
all right,

626
00:19:02,490 --> 00:19:03,840
weather conditions in Bozeman,

627
00:19:04,260 --> 00:19:05,310
man. I don't want to jinx it.

628
00:19:05,340 --> 00:19:05,520
I mean,

629
00:19:05,520 --> 00:19:07,020
we're going to try to get you guys on the ground

630
00:19:07,020 --> 00:19:08,700
there, but the winds are kind of like,

631
00:19:10,230 --> 00:19:13,140
we'll see You there.

632
00:19:13,890 --> 00:19:14,220
I was like,

633
00:19:14,250 --> 00:19:14,520
all right,

634
00:19:14,520 --> 00:19:15,240
well, I mean,

635
00:19:15,240 --> 00:19:16,410
doors are shut and here we go.

636
00:19:16,410 --> 00:19:17,580
We're we're in the air now.

637
00:19:17,610 --> 00:19:21,600
And then it was a little Rocky and rolly landing and

638
00:19:22,230 --> 00:19:23,310
I was cool to cucumber.

639
00:19:23,310 --> 00:19:23,640
I was like,

640
00:19:23,640 --> 00:19:24,990
whatever I got this,

641
00:19:25,110 --> 00:19:25,830
it is what it is.

642
00:19:25,830 --> 00:19:27,570
I'm just going to get bumped around a bit.

643
00:19:27,570 --> 00:19:29,850
But like it is yeah,

644
00:19:29,850 --> 00:19:30,630
it will be okay.

645
00:19:31,080 --> 00:19:33,690
It's okay to have that reaction of being fearful.

646
00:19:33,690 --> 00:19:35,760
I landed in some pretty strong cross winds a couple of

647
00:19:35,760 --> 00:19:37,950
years ago where I thought we were for sure,

648
00:19:37,950 --> 00:19:41,520
going to die and sitting next to me was a flight

649
00:19:41,520 --> 00:19:43,550
attendant who was traveling back to Pittsburgh.

650
00:19:43,600 --> 00:19:45,780
So she was not on duty and she was asleep.

651
00:19:46,430 --> 00:19:47,310
And, and so,

652
00:19:47,430 --> 00:19:49,410
and she finally kind of opened her eyes and I looked

653
00:19:49,410 --> 00:19:50,340
at her and I said,

654
00:19:50,430 --> 00:19:53,370
are you for real it,

655
00:19:53,370 --> 00:19:54,150
she laughed.

656
00:19:54,150 --> 00:19:54,600
And she said,

657
00:19:54,600 --> 00:19:55,320
this is nothing.

658
00:19:55,320 --> 00:19:55,590
I said,

659
00:19:55,590 --> 00:19:56,640
this is not nothing.

660
00:19:56,940 --> 00:19:57,960
This is a hurricane.

661
00:19:58,020 --> 00:19:59,610
Okay. And she laughed.

662
00:19:59,610 --> 00:20:00,030
And she said,

663
00:20:00,300 --> 00:20:02,010
no, there's strong winds for sure.

664
00:20:02,250 --> 00:20:02,940
But no,

665
00:20:02,940 --> 00:20:03,930
it's, you know,

666
00:20:04,200 --> 00:20:05,610
it's not a big deal at all.

667
00:20:05,610 --> 00:20:05,970
And I thought,

668
00:20:05,970 --> 00:20:07,590
okay, so you know,

669
00:20:07,620 --> 00:20:09,120
it's not that you need to get rid of the fear

670
00:20:09,120 --> 00:20:11,430
completely because I don't think that's normal.

671
00:20:12,030 --> 00:20:13,590
You're still going to be out of control.

672
00:20:13,590 --> 00:20:15,150
And there's a portion of you.

673
00:20:15,150 --> 00:20:15,780
That's like,

674
00:20:15,840 --> 00:20:16,440
oh man,

675
00:20:16,470 --> 00:20:18,260
right? Like this scary,

676
00:20:18,260 --> 00:20:18,990
scary. Like,

677
00:20:18,990 --> 00:20:20,190
I don't know what's happening here.

678
00:20:20,190 --> 00:20:21,090
And it's out of my control.

679
00:20:21,180 --> 00:20:23,280
But I tell myself in those situations,

680
00:20:23,280 --> 00:20:24,600
like one way or the other,

681
00:20:24,600 --> 00:20:26,100
we're going to be on the ground in a couple of

682
00:20:26,100 --> 00:20:27,390
minutes. It's true.

683
00:20:28,200 --> 00:20:29,400
Because we were very like Alone,

684
00:20:29,430 --> 00:20:30,380
always comes To that.

685
00:20:30,380 --> 00:20:31,260
And I thought,

686
00:20:31,350 --> 00:20:31,740
I thought,

687
00:20:31,830 --> 00:20:32,880
he's going a little fast.

688
00:20:32,880 --> 00:20:33,810
He's coming in hot.

689
00:20:33,930 --> 00:20:34,530
He's a little high.

690
00:20:34,530 --> 00:20:35,100
He's a little out,

691
00:20:35,110 --> 00:20:35,460
you know,

692
00:20:35,770 --> 00:20:36,750
and I know nothing,

693
00:20:36,960 --> 00:20:38,850
but you land and then you okay,

694
00:20:38,880 --> 00:20:40,080
but your heart is racing.

695
00:20:40,140 --> 00:20:43,320
I think that is a normal human reaction to a situation

696
00:20:43,320 --> 00:20:44,190
that feels like death.

697
00:20:45,090 --> 00:20:46,020
True. True.

698
00:20:46,260 --> 00:20:48,490
And also just PSA for all of you guys out there

699
00:20:48,490 --> 00:20:51,040
that end up landing in a crosswind situation.

700
00:20:51,070 --> 00:20:55,300
The pilots put the plane down really freaking fast and hard

701
00:20:55,540 --> 00:20:57,820
so that a gust of wind doesn't come and like tip

702
00:20:57,820 --> 00:20:58,780
a wing into the CAS.

703
00:20:58,810 --> 00:20:59,380
So when you're like,

704
00:20:59,410 --> 00:21:01,600
man, that was a hard landing that was on Purpose.

705
00:21:01,630 --> 00:21:04,030
Right. I also watch air disasters.

706
00:21:04,390 --> 00:21:04,690
We'll see,

707
00:21:04,690 --> 00:21:05,530
I don't do that.

708
00:21:06,670 --> 00:21:09,400
But the funny thing is every time I watch it,

709
00:21:09,490 --> 00:21:12,970
I actually feel better about flying because every incident that happens

710
00:21:12,970 --> 00:21:13,720
makes it safer.

711
00:21:14,180 --> 00:21:16,510
Unfortunately, people obviously lose their lives,

712
00:21:16,540 --> 00:21:17,410
but you know,

713
00:21:17,440 --> 00:21:18,550
some weird thing happens.

714
00:21:18,640 --> 00:21:18,970
They're like,

715
00:21:19,000 --> 00:21:19,690
oh, they fix it.

716
00:21:19,720 --> 00:21:20,830
That will never happen again.

717
00:21:21,130 --> 00:21:21,370
I mean,

718
00:21:21,370 --> 00:21:23,470
there have been crashes that have been pilot error,

719
00:21:23,530 --> 00:21:23,890
you know,

720
00:21:23,890 --> 00:21:25,480
but Far and few between,

721
00:21:25,480 --> 00:21:28,090
correct? Like for the most part,

722
00:21:28,180 --> 00:21:30,280
except it was Boeing a couple of years ago.

723
00:21:30,280 --> 00:21:31,150
What was that?

724
00:21:31,750 --> 00:21:32,290
The max,

725
00:21:32,800 --> 00:21:35,590
The Max that was having all of those troubles literally kept

726
00:21:35,590 --> 00:21:37,210
crashing. There were two,

727
00:21:38,560 --> 00:21:41,200
but that's enough because that means it kept crashing and they

728
00:21:41,200 --> 00:21:42,970
pulled it didn't they pull that one or are they,

729
00:21:43,540 --> 00:21:46,930
They grounded it for a while and they fixed the software

730
00:21:46,960 --> 00:21:48,520
and they hold the pilots.

731
00:21:48,520 --> 00:21:49,780
That, that system existed.

732
00:21:50,590 --> 00:21:51,970
Well, that would be helpful.

733
00:21:52,060 --> 00:21:52,570
That's right.

734
00:21:52,570 --> 00:21:54,460
We watched the documentary.

735
00:21:54,850 --> 00:21:56,260
Yeah. They told the Yeah.

736
00:21:56,650 --> 00:21:57,160
Well my,

737
00:21:57,170 --> 00:21:58,060
my truly,

738
00:21:58,060 --> 00:22:01,840
and my litmus test is always when it's like certain low-cost

739
00:22:01,840 --> 00:22:03,610
airline or this or that,

740
00:22:03,610 --> 00:22:04,510
or you know,

741
00:22:04,810 --> 00:22:07,060
anything. And like when the max came back,

742
00:22:07,060 --> 00:22:07,450
I'm like,

743
00:22:07,480 --> 00:22:08,170
I asked my brother,

744
00:22:08,230 --> 00:22:08,470
I'm like,

745
00:22:09,040 --> 00:22:09,790
can I find the max?

746
00:22:09,790 --> 00:22:10,270
Is it safe?

747
00:22:10,270 --> 00:22:10,870
He's like,

748
00:22:10,930 --> 00:22:11,860
yeah. He eats.

749
00:22:11,880 --> 00:22:12,660
Sometimes he asked,

750
00:22:12,670 --> 00:22:13,150
who's like,

751
00:22:13,930 --> 00:22:14,680
oh, U S airline.

752
00:22:14,680 --> 00:22:15,160
Yeah, you're fine.

753
00:22:15,580 --> 00:22:18,450
Like, like there definitely is There,

754
00:22:18,460 --> 00:22:18,880
you know,

755
00:22:18,880 --> 00:22:21,550
trees And it truly is.

756
00:22:21,610 --> 00:22:22,990
And it comes down to,

757
00:22:24,320 --> 00:22:27,640
it comes down to training and there's a lot of parts

758
00:22:27,640 --> 00:22:30,490
of the world where their pilots just memorize stuff,

759
00:22:30,520 --> 00:22:34,240
but they don't actually understand the principles of flight and how

760
00:22:34,240 --> 00:22:36,580
to manage this large machine in the air.

761
00:22:36,580 --> 00:22:37,870
Should things go wrong?

762
00:22:37,900 --> 00:22:38,920
Yeah. You know what?

763
00:22:38,920 --> 00:22:41,830
My favorite pilots are like the old Vietnam vets,

764
00:22:41,920 --> 00:22:42,190
you know,

765
00:22:42,190 --> 00:22:42,790
old guys.

766
00:22:42,790 --> 00:22:44,110
Fine. Recently.

767
00:22:44,110 --> 00:22:44,770
I was last year.

768
00:22:44,770 --> 00:22:45,820
I think it was coming here.

769
00:22:45,880 --> 00:22:49,390
I was flying and the pilot came out and he was

770
00:22:49,390 --> 00:22:50,560
a literal baby.

771
00:22:50,590 --> 00:22:53,350
Okay. I thought this kid is so young.

772
00:22:53,350 --> 00:22:53,620
I'm like,

773
00:22:53,620 --> 00:22:54,430
where's the old guy.

774
00:22:57,730 --> 00:22:58,180
I mean,

775
00:22:58,180 --> 00:22:58,870
where's the,

776
00:22:58,930 --> 00:23:01,180
where's the one who was in the military or has seen

777
00:23:01,180 --> 00:23:02,440
combat. That's the guy,

778
00:23:03,160 --> 00:23:03,670
Tom Hanks.

779
00:23:03,670 --> 00:23:04,310
I want Tom.

780
00:23:04,750 --> 00:23:05,680
Oh yeah,

781
00:23:06,220 --> 00:23:07,360
yeah. That guy.

782
00:23:07,420 --> 00:23:07,990
Oh my gosh.

783
00:23:07,990 --> 00:23:09,400
That's a good story too.

784
00:23:09,610 --> 00:23:11,890
So you can actually survive plane crashes,

785
00:23:13,090 --> 00:23:14,140
although it's a little bit rare.

786
00:23:14,140 --> 00:23:17,260
Usually it's either everybody lives or everybody dies is what it

787
00:23:17,260 --> 00:23:21,430
seems to me as what I think we're instilling confidence for

788
00:23:21,430 --> 00:23:22,330
anyone right now.

789
00:23:22,480 --> 00:23:27,340
Okay. The bottom line is You Face your fear and you

790
00:23:27,640 --> 00:23:29,290
all, And I asked myself a different question.

791
00:23:29,290 --> 00:23:31,000
You asked Yourself a different question,

792
00:23:31,000 --> 00:23:32,080
but was it because you were like,

793
00:23:32,080 --> 00:23:34,300
okay, this has gone on long enough.

794
00:23:34,330 --> 00:23:34,780
I need to.

795
00:23:35,350 --> 00:23:36,280
And it was,

796
00:23:36,430 --> 00:23:37,690
it was truly,

797
00:23:38,230 --> 00:23:38,500
I mean,

798
00:23:38,500 --> 00:23:40,270
I know the statistics again,

799
00:23:40,270 --> 00:23:40,840
like I said,

800
00:23:40,840 --> 00:23:43,630
like, it is way more dangerous for me to hop in

801
00:23:43,630 --> 00:23:45,710
the car and go to the grocery store or get on

802
00:23:45,710 --> 00:23:49,760
the highway than it is to fly anywhere in the world.

803
00:23:49,760 --> 00:23:51,680
Even on questionable airlines,

804
00:23:51,860 --> 00:23:52,430
like true.

805
00:23:52,460 --> 00:23:56,330
It's still safer than driving anywhere,

806
00:23:56,330 --> 00:23:56,930
hands down.

807
00:23:57,080 --> 00:24:00,380
But because we drive so often that fear has been like,

808
00:24:00,400 --> 00:24:01,280
like the flight attendant,

809
00:24:01,520 --> 00:24:03,080
she flies all the freaking time.

810
00:24:03,260 --> 00:24:04,490
So when they're like,

811
00:24:04,490 --> 00:24:05,000
she's like,

812
00:24:05,570 --> 00:24:07,250
it takes a lot to rattle me now.

813
00:24:07,280 --> 00:24:09,560
Whereas somebody that's flown like once in their life,

814
00:24:09,560 --> 00:24:09,830
they're like,

815
00:24:09,830 --> 00:24:12,890
what's this what's that exposure Therapy.

816
00:24:12,890 --> 00:24:13,460
Yeah. Yeah,

817
00:24:13,900 --> 00:24:15,170
Yeah. They've been exposed to it.

818
00:24:15,170 --> 00:24:17,360
So they've inoculated themselves against the fear.

819
00:24:17,570 --> 00:24:21,260
But I think the biggest lesson here is to ask yourself

820
00:24:21,260 --> 00:24:21,950
a better question.

821
00:24:22,250 --> 00:24:24,500
How can I reframe the question?

822
00:24:24,800 --> 00:24:27,440
And am I actually following through on the train of thought

823
00:24:27,440 --> 00:24:28,130
instead of just saying,

824
00:24:28,130 --> 00:24:30,260
yeah, I have this fear of rejection and I don't like

825
00:24:30,260 --> 00:24:30,740
to be judged,

826
00:24:30,740 --> 00:24:31,730
period. It's just what it is,

827
00:24:31,730 --> 00:24:33,350
Heather. This will be the way it is.

828
00:24:33,620 --> 00:24:35,180
Okay. Fair enough.

829
00:24:35,210 --> 00:24:38,930
Could we ask a better question or follow that out?

830
00:24:38,930 --> 00:24:41,090
What if somebody says no to you?

831
00:24:41,150 --> 00:24:41,960
What if they do Joe?

832
00:24:41,990 --> 00:24:42,890
What if they talk about you?

833
00:24:42,890 --> 00:24:43,910
What if they reject you?

834
00:24:44,090 --> 00:24:49,010
Can you be okay with the potential of that maybe happening?

835
00:24:49,010 --> 00:24:49,640
Cause it might not.

836
00:24:49,670 --> 00:24:49,970
Yeah. Yeah.

837
00:24:50,150 --> 00:24:52,220
And I would then take it a step further.

838
00:24:52,220 --> 00:24:53,600
Can you be okay with that?

839
00:24:53,600 --> 00:24:58,970
And can you weigh that particular outcome with the opposite?

840
00:24:58,970 --> 00:25:00,710
Which is you never following your dream,

841
00:25:00,740 --> 00:25:01,760
right? Right.

842
00:25:01,820 --> 00:25:03,020
Wait, which one?

843
00:25:03,020 --> 00:25:03,860
Which one?

844
00:25:03,890 --> 00:25:04,310
You know,

845
00:25:04,310 --> 00:25:06,830
like, am I going to be when I'm,

846
00:25:06,830 --> 00:25:07,490
you know,

847
00:25:07,580 --> 00:25:10,910
95 and my time on this earth is coming to a

848
00:25:10,910 --> 00:25:13,070
close, am I going to be okay with like,

849
00:25:13,130 --> 00:25:15,320
oh, I really wish I did that,

850
00:25:15,350 --> 00:25:16,460
but good thing.

851
00:25:16,460 --> 00:25:17,150
I stayed safe.

852
00:25:17,150 --> 00:25:18,140
So nobody judged me.

853
00:25:19,910 --> 00:25:20,960
I stayed safe.

854
00:25:20,990 --> 00:25:22,070
Cause that Really matters.

855
00:25:22,460 --> 00:25:22,850
I mean,

856
00:25:22,850 --> 00:25:23,090
you know,

857
00:25:23,090 --> 00:25:23,990
our thing is like,

858
00:25:24,020 --> 00:25:24,710
did you die?

859
00:25:24,780 --> 00:25:26,000
Are you going to die?

860
00:25:26,120 --> 00:25:27,230
Okay. The airplane thing.

861
00:25:27,320 --> 00:25:28,400
I mean that's okay.

862
00:25:28,400 --> 00:25:31,010
But in the case of your pricing and rejection rejection,

863
00:25:31,040 --> 00:25:31,670
did you die?

864
00:25:31,670 --> 00:25:32,570
Would you know,

865
00:25:32,600 --> 00:25:33,590
it could hurt your feeling?

866
00:25:33,620 --> 00:25:34,340
Sure. Okay.

867
00:25:34,590 --> 00:25:35,330
That's fine.

868
00:25:35,480 --> 00:25:36,770
Can you be okay with that?

869
00:25:37,070 --> 00:25:39,290
You will never regret taking action.

870
00:25:39,740 --> 00:25:41,870
You will never regret at least trying.

871
00:25:41,870 --> 00:25:42,140
Cause then,

872
00:25:42,140 --> 00:25:42,650
you know,

873
00:25:43,010 --> 00:25:44,240
and then here's the thing.

874
00:25:44,540 --> 00:25:45,230
If it happens,

875
00:25:45,230 --> 00:25:47,150
if you do get rejected and you live through it,

876
00:25:47,180 --> 00:25:47,870
which you will,

877
00:25:48,140 --> 00:25:50,600
it will instill more confidence in you and you'll think,

878
00:25:50,600 --> 00:25:52,670
okay, that wasn't as bad as I thought,

879
00:25:52,850 --> 00:25:53,960
even if it did sting,

880
00:25:54,320 --> 00:25:55,370
I could do that again.

881
00:25:55,490 --> 00:25:56,540
And it emboldens you.

882
00:25:56,810 --> 00:25:58,130
So I would argue,

883
00:25:58,130 --> 00:26:01,190
you need to take the action and if you do get

884
00:26:01,190 --> 00:26:02,420
redrafted, I would say good.

885
00:26:02,870 --> 00:26:03,950
Yeah, because you learned,

886
00:26:03,980 --> 00:26:05,420
oh, exposure therapy.

887
00:26:05,900 --> 00:26:07,490
Now I know that I can be,

888
00:26:07,700 --> 00:26:10,670
it reminds me of the first several wedding seasons I had

889
00:26:10,670 --> 00:26:11,240
in Pittsburgh.

890
00:26:11,270 --> 00:26:13,880
I was actually very lucky with beautiful weather for many,

891
00:26:13,880 --> 00:26:14,600
many weddings.

892
00:26:14,720 --> 00:26:17,840
So much to the point where I had this unnatural fear

893
00:26:17,840 --> 00:26:19,940
of rain because I had never shot in it.

894
00:26:20,810 --> 00:26:22,490
And obviously I live in Pittsburgh,

895
00:26:22,520 --> 00:26:23,180
it's going to happen,

896
00:26:23,180 --> 00:26:24,050
going To happen.

897
00:26:24,350 --> 00:26:26,420
And the longer this went on,

898
00:26:26,720 --> 00:26:30,350
the more this fear just built up in me until one

899
00:26:30,350 --> 00:26:30,950
point. I mean,

900
00:26:30,980 --> 00:26:31,760
I'm talking,

901
00:26:31,760 --> 00:26:35,660
it was probably three or four years in it.

902
00:26:35,660 --> 00:26:38,810
Rain pour down rain on a wedding and a good friend

903
00:26:38,810 --> 00:26:40,700
of mine and it turned out great.

904
00:26:40,910 --> 00:26:43,500
And the wedding photos were fine and I survived and what

905
00:26:43,500 --> 00:26:44,280
that fear was gone.

906
00:26:44,820 --> 00:26:45,600
And now it was like,

907
00:26:45,600 --> 00:26:46,590
okay, sun rain.

908
00:26:46,650 --> 00:26:48,240
I know I can handle it,

909
00:26:48,420 --> 00:26:49,860
but I had to go through it,

910
00:26:49,860 --> 00:26:51,120
which was not pleasant.

911
00:26:51,150 --> 00:26:54,370
I actually had one of my Canon cameras shut down.

912
00:26:54,400 --> 00:26:57,000
That wedding stopped working because of a lightning strike.

913
00:26:57,420 --> 00:26:58,410
Some sort of elect.

914
00:26:58,440 --> 00:26:59,250
I don't know.

915
00:26:59,430 --> 00:26:59,970
I don't know.

916
00:27:00,150 --> 00:27:01,920
Lightning struck like near me,

917
00:27:03,330 --> 00:27:04,770
boom, like the whole church shook.

918
00:27:05,160 --> 00:27:07,620
And my second shooter came down from the balcony and said,

919
00:27:07,620 --> 00:27:09,960
this camera just like it Does the Dust.

920
00:27:10,920 --> 00:27:11,640
Isn't that crazy?

921
00:27:12,520 --> 00:27:13,140
I didn't get it fixed,

922
00:27:13,140 --> 00:27:13,830
but anyway,

923
00:27:13,980 --> 00:27:15,130
expose yourself to it.

924
00:27:15,130 --> 00:27:16,500
It might not be as bad as you think.

925
00:27:16,500 --> 00:27:17,730
Yeah. Oh my gosh.

926
00:27:17,850 --> 00:27:20,220
Such, such good advice.

927
00:27:20,610 --> 00:27:20,880
All right,

928
00:27:20,880 --> 00:27:25,830
everybody. We just wanted to share that quick little insight for

929
00:27:25,830 --> 00:27:28,650
you and hopefully it inspires you to take some action.

930
00:27:28,650 --> 00:27:32,760
Please let us know at Nicole Begley official on Instagram,

931
00:27:32,760 --> 00:27:33,390
Heather work,

932
00:27:33,840 --> 00:27:36,060
They can find me at flourish academy and let me know

933
00:27:36,060 --> 00:27:36,450
what is,

934
00:27:36,480 --> 00:27:37,590
what is the fear?

935
00:27:37,980 --> 00:27:39,810
What is the fear and how can we help you work

936
00:27:39,810 --> 00:27:40,140
through it?

937
00:27:40,170 --> 00:27:40,470
Yeah, Yeah,

938
00:27:40,560 --> 00:27:42,030
absolutely. All right guys,

939
00:27:42,090 --> 00:27:43,080
we'll see you next week.

940
00:27:43,110 --> 00:27:43,770
Bye everybody.

941
00:27:45,060 --> 00:27:47,010
Thanks for listening to the hair of the dog podcast.

942
00:27:47,040 --> 00:27:48,990
This was episode number 1 55.

943
00:27:49,230 --> 00:27:50,940
If you want to check out the show notes for access

944
00:27:50,940 --> 00:27:52,620
to any of the resources that we mentioned,

945
00:27:52,800 --> 00:27:57,210
simply go to www.hairofthedogacademy.com/

946
00:27:57,210 --> 00:28:00,330
1 5 5.

947
00:28:00,330 --> 00:28:04,080
Thanks for listening to this episode of hair of the dog

948
00:28:04,080 --> 00:28:05,730
podcast. If you enjoyed this show,

949
00:28:05,730 --> 00:28:07,560
please take a minute to leave a review.

950
00:28:07,560 --> 00:28:08,880
And while you're there,

951
00:28:08,880 --> 00:28:10,080
don't forget to subscribe.

952
00:28:10,080 --> 00:28:11,880
So you don't miss our upcoming episodes.

953
00:28:12,420 --> 00:28:13,140
One last thing,

954
00:28:13,530 --> 00:28:16,200
if you are ready to dive into more resources,

955
00:28:16,500 --> 00:28:20,100
head over to our [email protected]

956
00:28:20,100 --> 00:28:20,640
of the dog.