Nicole (00:00)
In today's episode, we are jumping into a giant rule of sales and that is the less you assume, the more you're going to sell.

If you're a photographer that's selling your artwork, you're going to want to listen to this episode. So stay

Nicole Begley (00:16)
I'm Nicole Begley, a zoological animal trainer turned pet and family photographer. Back in 2010, I embarked on my own adventure in photography, transforming a bootstrapping startup into a thriving six-figure business by 2012. Since then, my mission has been to empower photographers like you, sharing the knowledge and strategies that have helped me help thousands of photographers build their own profitable businesses. I believe that achieving $2,000 to $3,000 sales is your fastest route to six-figure businesses;

that any technically proficient photographer can consistently hit four figure sales. And no matter if you want photography to be your full-time passion or a part-time pursuit, profitability is possible. If you're a portrait photographer aspiring to craft a business that aligns perfectly with the life you envision, then you're in exactly the right place. With over 350,000 downloads, welcome to the Freedom Focus Photography Podcast.

Nicole (01:18)
Welcome back to the Freedom Focus Photography podcast. I'm your host, Nicole Begley. Today, we kind of have a two-part episode. The first half is podcast number 356 from the Flourish Academy podcast, The Less You Assume, The More You Sell. In this eye-opening episode, Heather is delivering a powerful masterclass on what she calls financial fortune telling, which is the habit of assuming the client will or won't spend based on their appearance, lifestyle, or words.

Spoiler alert, it's not helping you. In fact, it's holding you back and most of us are doing it. If you've listened to that episode already, you can go ahead and skip forward to about 20 minutes because the second part of this episode is when Heather and I are going to do a deep dive about that episode. If you haven't listened to the one on Heather's podcast already, just stay tuned, listen to this entire episode. If you did, jump ahead to 20 minutes.

and stay tuned for the special conversation that her and I are having about this little Enjoy.

Nicole Begley (02:21)
When I first started putting this together, I thought, man, this is so good. This needs to be a master class inside of Elevate. But then I thought, man, everyone needs to hear this. So I think what I'll do is make this episode required listening for elevators, and then we can have a coaching call dedicated to this challenge.

But if you are not in Elevate, well, first of all, you should join us, check it out. The link is always in the show notes. But if you're not in Elevate and you'd like to get help with what I'm about to discuss, head over to getcoachedbyheather.com to register for our next free fast track coaching session. I would be thrilled to talk to you about this. What is quote this that I am referring to? Well,

multiple times per week over the past 100 years, I hear some version of this story. I had an inquiry that is asking about the pricing, which is crazy because she drives a Mercedes, so I know she can't afford me. Heather, they live in a mansion and they have this fancy pool. They just don't want to pay me.

This potential client is going on and on about her budget and how she can't afford my packages, but she also mentioned that she's having a custom kitchen built, which is crazy. She can obviously afford me.

Heather, I had a repeat client that asked me to do the same session for her, but for less money. And I know she can afford me because I just saw that she got her hair done. Essentially, what everyone is saying here is if they can afford it, then they should buy it. Well, let me tell you this story about my made up imaginary friend. We're going to call her Emma. Let's say Emma owns a boutique.

and sells high-end custom tailored jackets. And then one day her friend Jake walks in, tries on a jacket and says, wow, this is amazing, but it's not in my budget right now. And later that week, Emma sees Jake post on Instagram that he just bought a $500 pair of sneakers. Of course, Emma is furious. She vents to a friend. He said he couldn't afford my jacket, but look at those sneakers. He can afford it.

He just doesn't value my work. And then her friend laughs and says, Emma, do you want those sneakers? Wait, what? No, of course I don't. But you can afford them, right? Well, yeah, that's not the point. Okay, exactly. It's like saying someone who bought a luxury SUV should also want to buy a designer couch because they have the money. Or if someone spends $200 on dinner,

They should also want to spend $200 on a yoga class because they can afford it. I want you to really let this sink in, remember it. People do not spend money based on what you think they should value. They spend based on their own priorities. Again, we have this baseline assumption that if they can afford it, then they should buy it. But let's flip that. Have you?

ever chosen not to buy something even though you could afford it? Maybe you skipped the $200 concert tickets because you'd rather spend that money on a weekend getaway. Maybe you drive a nice car but you buy generic groceries. Maybe you invest in business education but wouldn't dream of spending $500 or more on a purse. Oh wait, that's me. I've talked about that a lot. I will spend tens of 20s of 40s of thousands of dollars

on business education, but I'm telling you what, if that purse is more than $39.99, I'm out. Does that mean that I'm cheap? Does that mean that you're cheap or that you don't value, say, music, food, fashion, whatever? No, of course not. It just means you make financial choices based on your priorities. And guess what? That's exactly what your clients are doing. It is not personal. It's never been personal. It is not about you.

It's just how people work. Imagine that you just invested in a new camera lens, one you needed to improve your work. You're excited until a friend says, wait, you just said you couldn't afford to go on that weekend trip with us, but you had money for that? How would you feel if your friends had that to you? It would be annoying, right? Frustrating, like they don't understand your priorities. Now want you to flip that.

When you judge a client for not booking you, you are doing the exact same thing. Another thing photographers love to play is the quote, I know what they will spend game and you lose every single time. I've heard things like, Heather, I walked into this tiny rundown, messy cluttered hoarders looking house and thought,

There's no way they're going to buy anything. And then I walked out with a $2,000 sale and oh, by the way, they paid cash. Or this client seemed totally uninterested. I couldn't read her at all. I assumed she was just price shopping and I had a $4,000 sale. Or this wealthy client adored her photos. She loved me. She raved about my work. And then she only spent $500. Do you see the pattern here?

Every single assumption was wrong. You think you can predict spending behavior, but you cannot. The only thing assumptions do is hold you back from serving your clients more fully and from making more money. It's time to drop the judgment, just show up, do your job and let them decide what they value. As I started exploring this, I was just really curious, like, why do we do this?

I think at its core, this habit of judging clients' spending choices isn't really about them. Shocker. It's about us. We make assumptions because we are trying to protect ourselves. If we think we know what a client will spend, we feel more in control. If we assume that they're cheap or they can't afford it, then we don't have to face the fear of rejection. But here's the real reason.

We project our own money beliefs onto our clients, actually onto everyone else in the world. If you feel uncomfortable spending a lot on photography, you'll assume that others do as well. If you struggle with pricing confidence, you'll assume clients will resist whatever you have to offer. If you see money as scarce, as a scarce resource, you will believe your clients do as well. I think we do this

because it's easier to blame clients for not spending than to examine our own thoughts about money. But I want to offer something. What if you just stopped doing that? What if you let go of assumptions, stopped taking it personally, and focused on serving every client fully without judgment? Because the truth is, how you think about money is exactly how you assume others think about it.

And that belief is either helping you or more often, it's holding you back. I think we as humans, but especially photographers, hate uncertainty. Walking into a session not knowing if a client will spend feels uncomfortable. So what do we do? we make something up. We scan their car, their house, their clothes. We analyze their tone in emails. We search for clues, anything, anything.

to predict what they will spend. Because if we can guess ahead of time, we think we can protect ourselves from disappointment. But as you might already recognize, it's all just a story. It's a narrative we make up. It's something we tell ourselves so that we can feel in control. We assume someone is cheap, so that way we won't feel rejected. We assume they are rich, so then we get our hopes up. And then we're wrong.

like every time and then we scrambled to justify it and we feel even more confused. What if instead of trying to fill the void with made up narratives, you just embraced the unknown? I recognize that it might be uncomfortable, but so what? What if we walked into every session with an open mind, served the client at the highest level and let them decide what they value without our ego getting in the way? So I have five ways on how to catch this.

and overcome it. Number one, I just want you to notice what you're thinking before a session. Ask yourself, am I already making assumptions like they won't spend much because their house is small? They'll buy a ton because they are wealthy. They don't seem that interested. So this is a waste of time. This is a red flag. If you're making a prediction about a client spending before they've seen their photos, you are in assumption territory, which will most likely get you killed.

I know I'm dramatic, seems extreme, but it's definitely going to harm you. Number two, when you catch yourself making an assumption, just take a deep breath, stop and try this reframe. If you're thinking they can't afford it, replace it with, I have no idea what they'll do. If you're thinking she's not interested, replace it with, she booked me, so she must see some value. If you think that rich people will always spend more,

Replace that with every client makes choices based on their priorities, not their bank account. I had a bride once that when I arrived at the wedding, I recognized that everything was DIY. She had a friend do the flowers, a friend do the cake. It was at a smaller venue. And at one point during the day, she said to me, Heather, my photos, the legacy of this wedding, my memories are the most important thing to me. I used the entirety of my budget on you.

She did not have a lot of money for her wedding, but that was her priority. Okay, great, great. I was happy to be part of it. Number three, focus on what you can control. You cannot control a client's budget or their priorities, but you can control how well you serve them, how confidently you present your pricing, and how much value you provide. And I believe that when you shift from guessing

to giving your energy changes and so do your results. Number four, treat every client the same. I promise you, you are not doing this. You're going to tell me you're doing this and I know you're not and the reason I know that is because I don't. In most photographers I know, do not treat every client the same. But your job is not to predict spending. You're not a fortune teller or a mind reader or some sort of

financial investigator, your job is to serve, provide value and offer your work confidently, period. The moment you try to guess what a client will spend, you've already lost because you're basing your actions on a story you have made up, which is not based in reality. Here's the secret. The less you assume, the more you sell.

I think that's worth writing down and committing to memory. The less you assume, the more you sell because clients feel the difference when they are treated without judgment. So drop the crystal ball. Just show up, do your best work and let the client decide what they value. Number five, make it a game. Every time you catch yourself assuming, just mentally say, there I go again. How funny. There goes my brain and then challenge yourself to let it go.

Over time, you will realize something very powerful. The more you drop assumptions, the more money you actually make. So please allow me to summarize. Here's what's happening. Photographers constantly judge what clients will or won't spend based on houses, cars, outfits, or even their tone in an email. They assume wealth means big sales and modest living means low spending. But time and time and time again,

These assumptions turn out to be completely wrong. But here's why it's a problem. Because then you hold back. If you assume someone won't spend, you might not give them your best service or present your full pricing confidently. You might not even present some things at all because you think, well, she's not gonna buy this, so I won't even tell her about it. You also set yourself up for disappointment. Expecting a big sale from a wealthy client can obviously lead to frustration when they don't buy.

And then you make it personal. So instead of focusing on serving, you create stories about why a client should or shouldn't spend money and whether or not they value you and your soul. You make it completely about you. And taking things personally just never feels good. But I'm gonna tell you why you need to take this seriously. It's because these assumptions are limiting your success.

You are projecting your own money beliefs onto clients, which affects how you sell. The more you assume, the more you miss opportunities to genuinely serve and increase your income. Okay, so lastly, this is what to do about it. Number one, catch yourself. Notice when you're making snap judgments. Number two, reframe the story. Remind yourself, I have no idea what they'll do. Number three,

Shift your focus. Instead of predicting, focus on serving every client at the highest level. And number four, drop the crystal ball. You are not a fortune teller. Your job isn't to control what they spend, it's to offer your best and let them decide. Again, the less you assume, the more you will sell. If this episode resonated with you,

This is an example of the things we cover inside of our Elevate program. Elevate goes far deeper than just pricing or marketing strategies, which we do have, but it's about creating lasting transformative results through mindset coaching combined with those proven business tools. And while many programs stop at strategies, Elevate stands out, we're unique because it answers the critical question, what do you do when those strategies don't work?

you can take the most perfect, professional, awesome pricing strategy program. But if you have thoughts like the ones we discussed in this episode, you are limiting yourself. And this dual focus on mindset and strategy is what sets us apart inside of Elevate. We're not just teaching photographers what to do. We're teaching them how to think so that they can execute consistently and thrive no matter what.

challenges arise. As always, I'll have that link in the show notes. I hope that you found this useful.

Nicole (18:44)
All right, Heather, you and I are going to break it down and this freedom focused photography bonus super special.

extra after the podcast setting.

Heather (18:57)
Isn't that brilliant? You know, when I first recorded this, as I was recording it, I was thinking to myself, my gosh, Nicole has to hear this. We have to have a discussion around this because it is everywhere. You know, I'm sure you've heard it as well. Yes. So we need to just like chit chat about what's going on here and our thoughts. And question, did you ever experience this?

Nicole (19:21)
my gosh. mean, so many times, especially, you know, as you've been in business for a while, you start to realize that it doesn't matter. So you kind of hopefully stop judging that and like stop having those expectations for certain clients based on certain things, because you realize that it doesn't matter that it is there is, yeah.

There's nothing going on that you can be like, that's it. They're definitely going to spend or they're not because I have had clients that had, you know, their second, I don't know, third home was a seven figure house. And this was, you know, 15 years ago before, before the housing market went crazy. And, you know, they were one of my lowest sales ever. And then I had other people that wanted to book me.

was a student waited till they graduated from nursing school, hired me and spent several thousand dollars. And some of my biggest sales were definitely the most unassuming people that like were just kind of normal people that I thought would, you know, maybe have a $2,000 sale and they're spending seven or $8,000. So there is, you just have no idea.

Heather (20:32)
You don't, there's no rhyme or reason to it. Yet we continually attempt to guess at what's going to happen because our brains don't like uncertainty. We want to fill the void and you'll hear this, people will hear this and they'll be like, yes, that makes sense. And they will continue to make these judgments on what people will spend. What are your thoughts on why we do that?

Nicole (20:55)
Because we're human and we have a brain. Yeah. mean, our brain wants to make patterns, right? Like we are built with pattern recognition. So we are desperately seeking patterns so that we can guesstimate what is going to happen and predict what's going to happen next. But I think that can hurt us because if we go in assuming, I mean, really it goes back to, we talk about the model a lot, right? And so

Heather (20:57)
I guess, right? That's the bottom line.

Nicole (21:23)
Let's talk about that circumstance is I have a client and then if your thought is, this client isn't going to spend and then, you know, what is your feeling going to be when you go into that? You're going to be like, like just kind of like already deflated and maybe already kind of like resentful and bummed. And so then you're.

likely not going to serve them from the same, certainly not from the same energetic place, even if you go through the same motions. And so then the result might be that they aren't as impressed with your services or final images because you didn't bring your A game. Where if you go in same circumstance, you have a client, client lives in this house, but you go in with a thought of, you know, this is going to be great or like, I'm going to serve every client the same.

I don't know what they value and I'm going to trust that they value me, then you're going to show up different and they're going to have a likely a better sale.

Heather (22:23)
Everything becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy, everything. And I also think there's a component here that's like, if I tell my brain ahead of time that I'm going to be disappointed in the sale, so I feel the disappointment ahead of time, then that will maybe prevent me from feeling disappointment in the future. So there's also this self-protection mechanism at play here. I think there's the judgment of the client, but then there's also like, okay, if I

Nicole (22:25)
Yeah.

Heather (22:52)
lower my expectations and the client ends up spending a lot, I will be happily surprised. So there's that angle. And then I think that photographers, even when the client appears to be wealthy, have this thought they're going to spend a ton of money. know that they're taking a risk, they think, sorry, that they're taking a risk with that thought because what if they don't? And what I'm arguing here or offering is that

Nicole (22:58)
Mm-hmm.

Heather (23:17)
you treat every client the same and you go in with the thought that they value me and they're going to spend a ton of money. I just like to believe that everyone has tons of money. Everybody has so much money, they're ready, willing and able to pay and they're going to just spend it all, thousands and thousands of dollars on photography. But here's the thing, here's the thing. I am okay if they don't because I can manage my brain around disappointment. So it doesn't bother me to get excited ahead of time.

Nicole (23:41)
Mm-hmm.

Heather (23:46)
Some people know that they cannot handle excitement ahead of time followed by disappointment. So they preemptively feel disappointed.

Nicole (23:58)
I mean, this is across the board, not just for, you know, trying to figure out what sales coming in. I mean, this could be going for your yearly goals for your business. This could be trying a new marketing strategy. This could be literally anything of, and you've said it before, what was it basically that we're just trying to avoid an emotion, right? Like the disappointment. so how do people get better?

Heather (24:20)
Yes, yes.

Nicole (24:24)
with disappointment because look, there's still going to be times where we're going to go in with this thought of everybody has lots of money. They're going to spend thousands and they don't, you know, for whatever reason, maybe they were planning to, maybe their circumstances changed, maybe, you who knows? There are so many things that have nothing to do with us that we like to make it about us and then immediately assume that, I need to change my whole business because obviously if my pricing was lower, they would have spent more, which

Heather (24:51)
Obviously, right.

Nicole (24:51)
No, if your

pricing was lower, they spend less because it's that's less.

Heather (24:54)
less valuable. Yeah. Well,

I think it starts with something I said in the episode. I love this line that you have to eradicate from your brain, which is if they can afford it, they should buy it. You have to just get rid of that thought because you that's not fair. You know, and I shared this example of like, what if you went out and bought a new lens or a camera and you spent multiple thousands of dollars and then your friends were like, wait a minute. You said you couldn't afford to go with us to this.

concert or weekend getaway, but yet you spent $5,000 on camera gear, you would not appreciate your friends judging you that way, but yet that's exactly what you're doing to your clients. You are essentially saying, if they can't afford it, then they should buy it. So that's like a thought, just recognize it. listen, no shame or judgment. You don't realize you're thinking that. It's an automatic thought.

That's why my job is to bring it to the light and say, Hey, this is what your brain is doing. You're like, okay. I'm not going to think that anymore because that's not fair. And I don't want to be judged. So that's the first thing that in my mind is like, check, you know, the next it's the, you were saying a moment ago about disappointment. How do you handle feeling disappointed? And I think the first thing is you just don't make it a problem and you don't try to get rid of it. So I'm not suggesting that you.

Don't feel disappointment because you're a human. I'm saying disappointment is coming. And everywhere in life, disappointment is coming. But what if it were okay? What if you could trust yourself to handle it? Then you wouldn't feel, it wouldn't be something to be avoided. You would just be like, okay, yes, no kidding. I'm disappointed that this person who I perceive to be wealthy spent $500 and I thought they would spend 5,000.

Yeah, of course you're going to be disappointed. Like what if you just said, yeah, this sucks. I don't like it and I'm going to be OK. So like I'll get over it. Like so what next? If you believe you're an in-demand photographer and that there's a line of people waiting out the door, you're just be like, OK, the next one there's there's going to be ups and downs in your sales. Why does it have to be a problem, though? You could say I can trust myself. I can handle feeling disappointed.

Nicole (26:46)
huh. Yeah.

Mm-hmm.

Heather (27:08)
So I certainly don't need to feel it ahead of time and feel it twice, but I can handle it if it happens. And so then I just shrug my shoulders and I'm like, okay, so what? That's my latest phrase, by the way, I use with clients. like, so what? Do you think you really can't manage that feeling? I think you can.

Nicole (27:26)
Well, and this goes to what you say a lot of times too, is stay out of people's pocketbook, right? It's like, don't know. We don't know what their situation is. There's a lot of people that are over leveraged that maybe they're driving a car or living in a house that they can't afford and they don't have any extra money. Or maybe there's somebody showing up on a 15-year-old car.

Heather (27:31)
Yes.

Nicole (27:49)
that it's been paid off and they're like, well, it still works. So why would I get a new car? Cause they don't value having a brand new car cause they would rather just not have a car payment. you know, so we just, we have no idea what's actually going on, in their, in their bank and what, kind of money they have. And this actually brings up something else that happens a lot too. Cause I talked to a lot of photographers that. And during the sales process, you know, you come to a total.

and maybe that total is pretty big and inside you're kind of freaking out a little bit. And we say it and then there's silence for a minute. And we feel the need to fill the silence, to start offering discounts, to just assume because the person is silent that they are thinking, my God, I'm getting ripped off by this person. Who the hell does she think she is to charge this much? How am I going to say no? I need to like walk this back. Like we're spiraling all over the place.

And meanwhile, the client might just be thinking, all right, so should I do that in a credit card or would I rather do this credit card? Which credit card gives me the most points? Or am I going to have to transfer some money from savings? So they're just maybe thinking logistically of what makes sense for how they're going to pay for it, but there's no question about them paying for it. They just need a minute.

Heather (28:54)
Yeah, that's what you think.

Yeah, and you know, that's because we project our own money beliefs onto our clients. We're just like projections. You know, and at the core of all of this, I said this in the episode, at the core of all of this, judging whether people should hire us or what they should spend, it has nothing to do with them. It is about us. It is everything that's happening in your brain that you are trying to make sense of. You're trying to fill the void.

You're trying to understand. You're telling yourselves these stories. You're making up these narratives and nine times out of 10, they are not serving you. So when you catch yourself thinking, I know she can afford this because of, you know, her new kitchen or whatever, I just want you to get really curious, maybe even chuckle at yourself and think, there goes my brain again. What is this saying about me? If you can listen, this is like this is like.

Nicole (29:55)
Hmm.

Heather (30:00)
next level ninja mind management. I mean, at least try it. But when you master it, you're so empowered. You just catch that your brain is doing that. And you're like, oh, what I'm assuming is that if she has money, she should spend it on me. That's what I'm assuming. Or that she should, you know, purchase a 10 or $15,000 package. But really, my job is to serve the client. Like, could we shift all of this energy?

that you are using, making up all of these stories. Could you shift that energy and use your brain to just being in service? Because then I think you're gonna start bringing in some real money.

Nicole (30:38)
I mean, that's really the secret all along for marketing, for sales, for just really the entire process. Because as soon as we start, like when we're marketing our business and we're thinking about like, okay, how do I even using these words, get these clients to book me? Like, like we're tricking them, like we need to make them do something. We don't control what they do.

Heather (30:41)
that you're limiting your sale.

Yes.

Nicole (31:06)
Like instead, what if it's, my job is to let people know the value of this and make sure everybody knows how I can help them. They get to decide if they say yes or no. Like our job is to let them know about it without attachment and judgment.

Heather (31:23)
Yeah, your job is to make the offer. Just make the offer. Put the offer out there and let them decide and focus on service energy versus that get energy. Because when you're in get energy, you need to get a client, I need to get money, I need to get a bigger sale. That's when you start to feel salesy and slimy because you're in get energy. When you are in service energy, that doesn't even cross your mind. You're just like, I'm here to serve and make this offer.

Nicole (31:42)
Mm-hmm.

Heather (31:50)
and let the client decide, it's up to them anyway, and just be neutral or I like to call it clean thinking, like where it's just like clean service energy and you're not all up in your head about a million things because when you are, you are for sure limiting your sales.

Nicole (31:59)
Mm-hmm.

Heather (32:10)
because your brain is on cognitive overload with all of these stories and what they should be doing or not doing. And when you're just, clean your mind and you're just like, I'm here to serve, know, I'm here to offer my services and let them decide and whatever they decide is perfectly fine because I can handle excitement. I can handle disappointment. I can handle frustration. Like whatever the emotion is, I don't have to avoid it because I can manage it.

Nicole (32:13)
I'm gonna do that.

I'd love it. I love it. So good. So I hope you guys find this helpful to just drop into that reminder every now and again, and, be on the lookout for when we are, are making those judgments. and, yeah, and just let our, let our clients decide. And we, our job is to just make an offer, see if they want a book, serve them throughout the process and let them know what.

What we, how we can help them, how they can enjoy their images and let them decide.

Heather (33:10)
Just let them decide and don't

assume because somebody has money that they should spend it on you. That doesn't even make sense.

Nicole (33:16)
Mm-hmm.

All right. Thanks everybody. Good to hear from you. We'll talk to you next week.