00:00:00 Welcome to The Hair of the Dog podcast. I'm your host, Nicole Begley. And in this episode, you guys are gonna witness a transformation that has literally changed my life. It's been about two months almost since that transformation, and I am proud to say that not once, if I defaulted to my old thought pattern since Heather helped me unlock this new thought that has just really transformed everything.

00:00:26 So stay tuned. Welcome to The Hair of the Dog podcast. If you are a pet photographer, ready to make more money and start living a life by your design, you've come to the right place. And now your host, pet photographer, travel addict, chocolate martini connoisseur, Nicole Begley. Hey everybody. Welcome to the Hair of the Dog podcast.

00:00:50 I'm your host, Nicole Begley and founder of Hair of the Dog Academy. And today I am taking you behind the scenes on one of my coaching calls with none other, the one and only Heather Latan. See, earlier this year, I started doing some one-to-one coaching with Heather because, well, we all have stuff to work through. And Heather is a master at helping us work through all of the gunk that is in our head and all of the unhelpful thoughts.

00:01:16 You guys likely have heard her here on the podcast. She is an occasional guest coach here in the hair of the Dog academy. And of course, she's the leader of our Elevate program, helping photographers everywhere get massive results so much faster than they would if they were going at it alone. In this call, you guys are gonna listen behind the scenes to our actual unedited coaching call because I know there's probably a lot of questions out there of like,

00:01:41 what actually happens on a coaching call? What possible transformation can I get in 20 minutes that will change my life? Well, this, my friends is proof. And you can actually just go through the whole process with us. Now, there are times that maybe it might feel like it's moving a little slow because the big breakthrough comes towards the end, but again,

00:02:02 it is under 20 minutes. So go ahead, put it on like 1.2, 1.5 if you need to as you're listening to this podcast. But I encourage you to listen to the whole thing and to really see what it's like to actually be on a coaching call. Now, these coaching calls happen if you're doing one-to-one coaching. They also happen on just about every single call that Heather hosts inside our Elevate program,

00:02:24 or when she's an occasionally a guest host in the hair of the dog academy during our guest office hours. Truly, it is unbelievable what difference it could make. So to give you a little background, the thing that Heather and I talk about during this call is my pretty constant struggle with feeling like there's not enough time and the frustration that I would feel when I'm interrupted and when I don't get to actually work on the things that I wanna work on,

00:02:51 which are the big projects in my business, you know, the big fun things that are moving it forward. Things like revamping the academy, you know, creating new content, putting together new podcasts and, and things like this for you. And so when I wasn't able to work on those, like all the time, I would start to feel frustrated when I would get interrupted.

00:03:14 So in a matter of 20 minutes, we were literally able to shift this and replace that thought of, I'm never gonna get these big projects done with a brand new thought that I'm not gonna tell you what that thought is. You're gonna have to listen to that coaching program or that coaching call. But turns out it has completely shifted my view on work life and really pretty much everything.

00:03:37 And it has been almost two months, and there has not been one relapse into the frustration of feeling like there's not enough time, which if you know me, that is huge. So anyway, I'm gonna leave you to listen to this call, and if you are interested in getting more coaching like this in your life, you definitely wanna check out our Elevate program.

00:04:00 Just go to hair of the dog academy.com/elevate. And we have a new enrollment opening at the end of March if you wanna be with that new cohort, cohort starting April 1st. So anyway, check it out, enjoy the call, and I will see you after starting the timer for 20 minutes. Let, let's go. What's on your mind today? Oh,

00:04:24 Heather, you know how excited I am about like all the things. Yeah. Everything. Yeah, dude. Yeah. And then I feel like every time I try to do anything, the dog eating Colin sandwich, I have to do laundry. Somebody needs me, the dog is barking. Like I want, I want a house in the backyard, a shed.

00:04:47 I would like a shed, much like you would like a shed where I can just mostly live. Can I ha I told everybody the other day I was getting my own apartment, which I threatened all the time, but, so I feel this. Yeah, see, I would've already been in trouble for saying that. Right, right, right. I know.

00:05:11 Yeah. Okay. So what, what is the, what is the feeling, what's the emotion when you, when you think about all of that? It is just like tightness of the chest, of just like, I'm never, the thought then becomes, I'm never gonna get, I'm never gonna actually get these things that I wanna get done, done.

00:05:34 I'm never going to get, would it be safe to say I'm never going to get like anything done? I'm never gonna get anything? No, I don't get quite, but like I'm, I'm never going to have the space to focus to get my big goals done. Oh, get the important things done. I'm never going to get the important things done.

00:05:53 Okay. Because too much time spent doing the random little shit. I'm never going to get the important things done. Which leaves you feeling a tightness in your chest and frustration. Frustration, yeah. And what do you do when you're feeling frustrated and I continue down that frustration spiral. Yeah. You try to muscle and everything's annoying through things. Yeah. What's that?

00:06:23 You, would you say that you ruminate on the thought that I'm Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Spin, which just leads to more frustration. Yeah. What do you not do? Well, that's a good question. Thank you. I mean, I like to think that, I try to, I try to re be like, all right,

00:06:56 like, forget this little stuff can wait. And I try to reprioritize the big stuff and I try to tell myself, Hey, the kids are going to be at school soon. Like the, the quiet is coming. And then I question myself, like, why do I even bother trying to get anything done before? And then I'm like, well,

00:07:13 maybe I should just like meditate and work out and do all those things, even though I've been better with that. But it just goes down into a whole questioning, like all of my life choices, just because like the dog, no big deal. Just cause the dog ate something off the counter. Right, right, right. Well, that, that's because you ruminate.

00:07:32 Yeah. Yeah. And you spin. Okay, let ask the same question a different way. So what I said was, when you're feeling frustrated, what do you not do? Let me ask it a different way. If you were able to do what you wanted to do, what would you be doing? Oh, oh, I would have chunks of time that I am able to sit and focus and there is no interruptions.

00:07:59 So you would, you would focus and you would work Yeah. With no interruptions. Like no dog mark. Nobody asking me a question. No laundry needed to be done. Yeah. Like, just literally like, I don't exist. Right. To anyone. To anyone except what I'm working on. So the reason I ask the question that way is because if that's what you would do if you have the space,

00:08:25 that's exactly what you are not doing. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. No, it's so funny how you can ask it a different way and it's like, oh yeah, I, yeah, they teach us that. Isn't that interesting? Because sometimes just the, the rephrasing of the question hits your brain different, right? Yeah. Right. So you are not focusing and working on the things because you have all of these interruptions and the result is the big projects or the big things,

00:08:53 the big goals, they don't get done. They will get done, but I want them to get done faster. Yeah. Like I want to work on them so they take longer. Yeah. So the result is big goals take longer. What is the, I'm asking you as much as I'm asking myself, what is the circumstance here? Well, I was gonna say with those big goals take longer,

00:09:20 it's not necessarily the big goals take longer. Like I am on in the morning. Like that is when I'm like most excited to work and also the best mentally. But that is also when there's the most going on. Oh, right. I mean, and now it's not too late. Like Colin just left for school, but then I, then stuff starts sitting in my calendar,

00:09:43 which I try not to have things in the morning. Like I try to push stuff till the afternoon. Right. But it doesn't always work. But when you're, but today I don't have anything else until one. So, well, that's good. And we'll be done in 15 minutes, so I know. Yeah. When, when you have the thought,

00:10:00 I'm never going to get the important things done. And you feel frustrated, you spend, you don't focus. And the big goals take longer because you're thinking, I'm never going to get these things done. You know that everything becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. Right. But it's not. So the circumstance, oh, this is good. That's what it is.

00:10:20 It took me a second. The circumstance are the interruptions that interruptions in of themselves are neutral. Because if I interrupted you, I'm gonna talk about work. I would guess that your thought would be totally different. You wouldn't be thinking, oh, why is she asking me questions? I can never get anything done. People bother. You'd be like, yeah,

00:10:49 let's go. What are we gonna, what are we get away. You would totally different thought about the same circumstance. Right. That different thought would produce obviously a different emotion. If it were me, you were talking to me, you would probably be excited and energized and super focused, and then you would get all kind of shit done. Right?

00:11:15 Right. When we have our, you'd be like, let's go. But then our apartment in West Virginia, go ahead. Right, right, right. But the reason is because of the thought. Right? Yes. The circumstance is the same. I'm, I would still be interrupting you, but you would have a different thought about me than you would about the dog.

00:11:37 And I, first of all, I appreciate that. Thank you. But the circumstance inter, this is good. This is good interruptions, questions, you know, the dog meeting, whatever. I'm never going to get the important things done. You probably like sigh and roll your eyes and get that tightness in your chest. You feel frustrated, you ruminate,

00:12:00 you spin, you spin, which means cyclical. And then the big things take longer. Yeah. We cannot change circumstances. Right. The facts. And they're neutral. The only thing you can change here is your thought about that circumstance. Right? Now, I'm not suggesting that you have to like it, right, right. But I wonder, and I actually don't know the answer to this,

00:12:26 I wonder, because if we figured out for you, then I'm gonna benefit as well. I wonder if there's a different thought about, I'm, I'm paralleling like your interruptions are my parents interrupting me, the noises and all the things that go on here. And it's not, I don't have it nearly as bad as you do, but I wonder if there's a different thought you could have about the interruptions and the questions that would serve you better.

00:12:55 Okay. Obviously the answer is yes. Is there a way to flip it into a gratitude that like, Hey, I got a house full of people that I love. Yeah, sure. That doesn't hurt. I mean, makes you feel better. But I still wanna work, but I still wanna work. Right? So we have to, we have 10 minutes to uncover a thought,

00:13:19 find a new thought that feels believable and true and good, and makes you have a new emotion that's not frustration. Even if that emotion at this point is just neutrality. You know, it's not that you wanna, you're gonna be happier, excited about it. Yeah. And one thought is gratitude. Yeah. I'm thankful for these people. I, I'm thankful for the dog.

00:13:41 Of course. Of course. But that's not gonna be enough for you. Yeah. And I'll tell you why. Because you still wanna work and you still wanna be productive. I wonder if this isn't showing up in your life as part of your scarcity around time. A hundred percent. I mean, I know I still have a huge time scarcity deficit.

00:14:05 Because here's the thing, if you thought, if you were being interrupted like crazy all day, but your thought was, I am time. I get shit done all the time. I'm amazingly productive, inefficient in small windows. Yeah. This, we, we wouldn't even be having this conversation. Right. Therefore, it's not the interruptions. Yeah. No.

00:14:29 Yeah. The common denominator is there's never enough time. Yeah. There's, which I have right here on my computer, time and disillusion. I'm where time comes from. I have all the time I need. But you still don't believe it. It has not worked its way into my No, no, no conscious or subconscious brain yet. No, you still don't believe it.

00:14:45 You still, it's still, it's like me with the money, 220,000, there's still a lack in my mind. Right, right. Still, well, still wasn't enough. Oh, why? I don't know. Like how do I, like, do I need proof, but I know I need to have the faith before I have the proof. Yeah.

00:15:12 Yeah. Talk to me about, like, when you, we've had sort of had this conversation before when you started your photography business, it was not difficult for you to get clients. You just got clients. You built your business. It was like easy because you believed that there were clients, right? You believed that you could figure it out even if you weren't the best yet.

00:15:32 Right. You believed in your product and your service. You believed in yourself to deliver, you believed in your pricing. Here's the thing. I believe that I'll get it done. Like I don't believe that I'm not gonna be able to hit the March 1st, whatever. Like, so I, I know I'll hit it, but I, I don't know cuz I'm like always working up against this.

00:16:01 Like two 30 is like, it, like two 30 is stop time around here. And guess what that produces for you? Hmm. Lack. Yeah. Because you're looking at the gap, right? You are focused on the gap and the lack and, and I'm, I'm not judging you. Yeah, no, I know. Two clock is mine.

00:16:20 Yeah. So I, yeah, no, it is. I'm looking at all this stuff and I'm like, there's no way I'm gonna get this done in five hours. Well what if you said, I'm gonna get done exactly what I need to get done in five hours. I am. Oh man. I have five hours. Are you kidding? Yeah.

00:16:35 That's amazing. I have until two 30. I know. Sounds great. I don't believe it. Believe it. What could you believe? So Brooke was talking to weight loss person recently and that hates their body. And I hate my body, I hate my body. Right. And she's like, well, could you love your body? And the person is like,

00:16:53 no, that's gross. There's no way I could love my body. Yeah. And she said, okay, I want you to just say I have a body. Yeah. Right, right, right. Call it a latter thought. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So if you So I can believe I have five hours cuz it's true. You do have five hours.

00:17:07 So what if you wrote down, I have five hours. And that's a fact that you can, like that's a latter thought. You can believe that cuz it's true. Right. Start there. Start there. And then we're working towards looking at five hours as like, oh my gosh, that's so much time. Yeah. Wow. I've got, I can get a lot done in five hours.

00:17:30 I can, yeah. Right. I can get so much done in five hours. Cuz the truth is you can, and you know you can. Right. You just want more dinging. Hey, fair enough. So do I. But we have to look at what we've been given, right. Because we can't change the circumstance. I can't change three o'clock.

00:17:53 Just like you can't change two 30, the bus shows up at the church. I have to physically be there to pick him up. Right. But I also know this season is temporary. Right. Right. So that helps me to think. It's not that I'm never gonna have more time. I will, I don't have as much as I want right now.

00:18:13 That's true. But man, I've got five hours. I've got till three o'clock. What I will get so much done. But if you continue to think I'm never gonna get the big stuff done and feel frustrated, it's not going to happen. All problems, all problems are thought problems, all problems. It's nothing to do with the circumstance. It's how we're thinking about it.

00:18:39 Because I w I want you to hang on to the fact that if Yeah. Speak of the devil. Hey, leave it come. If I interrupted you same circumstance, you would've a different thought and you would've a different outcome. So if we could shift the thought. I like the, I like the thought of just focusing on the like, hey,

00:19:03 I have this like a neutral thought too to unplug the negative instead of I only have five hours just all right. No, I have five hours. I have five hours and it's okay to wish for more. Right. Right. It's fair. Yep. I wish I had 15 today. Yeah. And all the energy to go with it. But at some point,

00:19:23 you know, if you had 15 hours, if I had Yeah. I wouldn't have the energy to do that. Right. You'd run out. Yeah. You'd run outta steam. Right. So I wonder if five hours is not only what you have, but it's exactly what you need based on the amount of energy and focus you can expend. Yeah.

00:19:39 So what if more actually made it worse? You know, if you've ever been in situations where you've had too much time. Oh yeah, yeah. You drag it out. Yeah. So maybe the five hours is exactly what Nicole needs. Yeah. Because it forces you to focus $5 million business in 20 hours a week. Right? I mean, no problem.

00:19:58 Yep. So if you, if you are building a million dollar business, 1.2 million in 20 hours a week, five hours a day is more than enough. Perfect. Because five, even if you work five days a week, five times five is 25, which means now you're down to four days a week. Four days a week at five hours. This is actually what you want.

00:20:17 What if the thought was, I want five hours, this is what I want. Holy shit. Yep. I have five hours. This what I want. It's, it's, it's a combination. I have five hours and this is what I want. And both of those are true, aren't they? Yeah. So it's not even a stretch for you to believe this.

00:20:45 This is actually training, training you to create your 1.2 million business in 20 hours a week. Thank goodness you have these constraints. Wow. Oh no, a hundred percent. Cuz then I would sit at my desk all the time. So would I I'd never leave it. I love it. I would never leave. I'd go, I'd go get some food.

00:21:07 Maybe, maybe. Do you see this? This stuff is mind blowing. It is so good. The five hours is exactly exactly what I want and not what I need. Cuz I don't believe the what I need, but I do believe what I want. Yeah. Five hours is what I want. I mean, which means if that's true and it is,

00:21:34 that's the thought. So all the interruptions are happening. Circumstances the same, but the thought is, five hours is what I want. Then you feel excited because I'm building one. Well also it allows me to believe that it's like, cuz I do have five hours of fairly uninterrupted time. Like when these kids are at school, the dog goes to daycare on Tuesdays favorite day.

00:21:54 And truly, when I'm sitting down and doing focus work, I've started a new process where I close my office door, I put the dog in the crate and I put on some of like the brain music. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But, but yeah, no, I can get behind. I have five hours is exactly what I want. And when I sneak in,

00:22:12 then it becomes, when I'm sneaking in something here and there, that's just bonus. Bonus. That's because I want to bonus. That's not part of my, I have to be working. Like, that's it. Yeah. That's it. Yeah. It's not two minutes. Let do this. Right. Right. It's not coming from what, oh my God,

00:22:28 that what a hundred percent changed the reaction when I get interrupted at eight 15, I'm like, I'm not supposed to be working. This is not part of my five hours. Right. It's bonus if you, if you do, yeah. Right. But if not, the five hours is what you want anyway. You just unlocked a whole new level.

00:22:46 Let, let me tell you how, how this work, how awesome this is. I used to believe there's no way I could get somebody a transformation in 20 minutes. Oh. We're like, oh look, it's nine 20 Right on the dot. I changed the thought recently, very recently. Yeah. Right. That I could rock somebody's world in 20 minutes.

00:23:10 Yeah. We're tracking that down to five for our fast hot seats. I've seen Brooke do it in five. I've seen a lot of master coaches do it in 10. Yeah. And you know, when we, when, and I'm totally open when we start the conversation and like Yeah. I mean, I'm with you. This is a big problem.

00:23:26 I have it too. Yeah. Right. Yeah. But you get to what Oh, the thoughts and what you want. This is, this is a, it's a, it's a game. It's like you said, like next level Unlocked. Unlocked. I just had the secret, the secret level. It's unlocked now. Okay. All right. Go tell everybody how awesome it is to get transformed in 20 minutes.

00:23:52 I, that's amazing. Amazing. All right. I'll talk to you probably in five minutes. Okay. Okay. Welcome back. What did you guys think? Was it pretty incredible how we went from the beginning where it was just like frustration and feeling like I just, I just don't know what to do with this. This is just how things are,

00:24:14 which is how I think we all approach a lot of things in our life. We're just like, this is just how it is. But if there's something that's not serving you or you're not feeling great about something, there is 100% another thought that you can choose that will lead to different feelings and will actually lead to different actions because those feelings will allow you to take more action.

00:24:32 So the thoughts that we are telling ourselves are so unbelievably important. I really can't stress that enough. I see this so many times with people running a successful photography business and people that maybe are still struggling to get things moving. And oftentimes it is not a business problem so much as it is a thought problem. It's the stories we're telling ourselves, the limiting beliefs we're putting on ourselves,

00:24:56 which spoiler alert, we all have it. Every single one of us has these limiting beliefs or these underserving thoughts and sometimes we can't even see them. So that's when you can bring in someone else to kind of help you find them, help you figure out what they are, and then help you reverse them. Help you come up with another thought that serves our goals better.

00:25:18 So I hope you enjoyed that. Thanks again for joining us. If you like that and you wanna get some of Heather's ninja coaching powers for yourself, definitely go check out that Elevate program. It is at www.hairofthedogacademy.com/elevate. Life changing, I gotta tell you, it's a pretty small program still. And we had five, maybe six photographers hit six figures for the first time through the Elevate Program.

00:25:50 Coincidence? I don't know. I don't think so. I think it comes down to they were able to finally break through some of these limiting beliefs and take the action they know they needed to take in a way that was way more successful because of how important the stories that we tell ourselves are. Anyway, hope you enjoyed this week and I'll see you next week.

00:26:12 Thanks for listening to The Hair of the Dog podcast. This was episode number 180 3. If you wanna check out the show notes for access to any of the resources that we mentioned, simply go to www.hairofthedogacademy.com/ 180 3. Thanks for listening to this episode of Hair of the Dog Podcast. If you enjoyed this show, please take a minute to leave a review. And while you're there,

00:26:35 don't forget to subscribe so you don't miss our upcoming episodes. One last thing. If you are ready to dive into more resources, head over to our [email protected] of the dog academy.com. Thanks for being a part of this pet photography community.